Costumes in closets, leaves litter our lawn.
Seasons are shifting; calling winter’s dawn
Family and friends will break bread together
Changing their moods as the sky changes weather
Thanksgiving falls first; scents curl through the air
As gratitude grows to a communal affair
On this day of thanks, take time to digest
Not just your food, but the ways you are blessed

I am thankful…

For an amazing, supportive family, a remarkable team, and a fertile mind.

This year has given me more to be thankful for than any before. I’m grateful for all I’ve been given, everything I’ve earned and the budding fruit of my hard work and patience.

When you swim against the tides, furiously pushing yourself past rolling waves of toil, you need encouragement to keep you going.

Thank you to everyone who has supported and believed in me this year. It has meant everything and more.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I don’t know what was harder, a month without finger licking foods, or being married to a woman capable of making me anything my heart desired who simply stood in the kitchen, doing nothing to satisfy my appetite.

But it wasn’t her fault. I’m the one who begged her to deprive me.

To accompany our fresh start in a brand new city, I decided to scrub my body inside out. So, despite rolling my eyes at my mom every time she’s mentioned the word “cleanse,” I headed to the health food store to start one of my own.

Cindy, loving and devoted wife that she is, agreed to join me.

For 30 days of September we eliminated coffee, dairy, sugar, alcohol, vinegar, wheat products, breads, rice, and potatoes from our diet – you know, the good stuff. We then replaced the usual yummy with live alkaline foods such as dark green, red and yellow veggies, fruits, soy beans, sprouted nuts, seeds, grains and essential oils (flax seed, raw nuts and fish).

The hardest part had to be my morning love affair with dairy and coffee, but once we made it through the self-inflicted cruelty of those first three days, we were clean, green machines.

Admittedly, I could never have managed without her. I’ve an iron will when my choices are few. Left to my own devices, I’d either starve myself or roll down my car window to trade a folded bill for a cheap poison dinner.

Cindy makes it easy.

Her cooking is so good, she makes fasting delicious. And though she’s always been a health conscious cook, there’s a massive difference between light fat and no fat at all.

Yet knowing what you want means knowing what you’re willing to surrender in order to get it.

I wanted a body that looked and felt better, along with the energy that goes along with it, so I swore to myself that I’d eat only what I was supposed to, plus run two and half miles, six days a week for the entire month.

As with any well set goal, I needed a carrot at the end of my stick, preferably baked into a cake or two. So Cindy and I set a dinner date for October 5 and agreed that if we were good for the entire month, we would dine at this dainty little restaurant we’d been wanting to visit since our first week in Ohio.

I’m not sure if you’ve ever noticed, but “desserts” is “stressed” spelled backwards. I never did, at least not until around the third week of the month when I found myself juggling a 101 balls without a single scoop of ice cream.

I stayed on course, ran approximately 60 miles, and made it within a single pound of what I weighed when Ethan was born. And though I probably gained back 17 of them after our long anticipated dinner, I still feel physically better than I have in years.

Sure, it’s always easier to roll downhill than it is to trudge upward one grueling step at a time, but life keeps on teaching me that the view is ALWAYS better from the top.

Some of you may have noticed the dwindling blog posts during the last few weeks.

While I said I’m busy, that’s only partially true. I’ve also been wrestling with a difficult decision to come clean with you, the reader.

While you have gotten to know me (and my writing partner David Wright of Blogger Dad) as fathers and writers over the past year and a half, we haven’t been exactly honest.

Remember how last year Men With Pens came out and admitted that neither of them were in fact men (and oddly, neither used pens, but rather pencils)?

That was nothing.

This confession is far more shocking.

And a bit more painful because someone has basically forced us to come out and admit who we really are. It’s a long story and not worth going into other than to say we are setting the matter straight on our terms, not anybody else’s.

While it will come as a shocker, some of you have stumbled on the truth, even if you didn‘t know it. Deep Friar and others on Twitter have joked that Dave and I are actually the same person.

Well, congratulations. You were right.

Sean Platt and David Wright are in fact one person.

And neither of us is really a father.

Actually, we’re a mother.

Go ahead, soak it in.

Our, or rather, my real name is Jessica McCormack. I’m a mother of not one, but three children. Yes, Writer Dad and Blogger Dad are actually Writer Mom and Blogger Mom.

You knew we were just a bit too sensitive to be men, right?

But that’s not all.

Here’s the part which will come as a surprise to the person who has threatened to out “us.”

My name isn’t REALLY Jessica.

In fact, I’m not even an American.

I’m an alien. No, not a filthy Canadian like Friar, but rather a REAL alien. As in from outer space.

My real name is Yutvifhtxzz (or as close as your language can pronounce it) and I come from another planet just outside your solar system. The planet is called xj87d, and exists in the solar system you have named Epsilon Eridani, which is roughly 10.5 light years from your sun.

I came here to live among you humans in hopes of understanding you.

In the past 2 years, I’ve tried to figure out why:

People stop in doorways as they exit stores to look at their receipts in total disregard for the people behind them?

Every comment section on every website with either news or videos devolves into either a racist or disturbing conversation?

Why MTV is called Music Television?

Why humans will return to the fridge and open the door over and over when they are hungry, as if they expect new food to magically appear?

Why every mattress dealership this side of Alpha Centauri always has large signs advertising a giant price reduction?

I didn’t say I was here for anything important, and I’m still no closer to understanding people than I was two years ago.

Now that the secret’s out, I suppose you’ll go off and read some human’s blog. Thanks for getting to know us, er, I mean me.

It’s been fun.

One last thing. Since we’re in the spirit of confession, I figured you should see a photograph of the real me, not the Hollywood actors and drawings I’ve employed for the past two years.

I must warn you, though. My species is repugnant to look at. Hideous monsters that will frighten all but the most jaded observer.

You have been warned.

If content marketing doesn’t bore you, then you’ll think this is awesome.

I’ll keep it short either way.

Though I have a lot going on, I try to keep business off the site as much as possible. Occasionally I’ll mention something either because I think it’s of genuine interest, or (rarely) because I’m trying trying to set some SEO in place, But for the most part what you get here is my version of fatherly art, four days a week.

However, I can see by the emails that there is curiosity.

I started a series on Ghostwriter Dad a few weeks ago. I’m not ready to blog about being a ghostwriter and I want to be genuine in anything I write. But the site needs content and I can’t afford to stop publishing over there. The SEO on the site is strong, enough so that it’s currently on page 1 for the general term “ghostwriter.”

I thought of the perfect solution. I’m now using the strong SEO on the site to benefit both myself and any reader who wants to learn about content marketing.

Simply put, content marketing is the means of growing a site through the creation of quality content which fuels word of mouth. It’s what David and I do for every site in the Collective Inkwell family. Each week we’re putting out a ton of great content. Why not use Ghostwriter Dad as a place to pull it all together?

So each Monday I’ve been doing a roundup that explains everything we did the previous week, along with the why. If something was a success, I write about it. If it was a failure, I write about that too. If it didn’t go one way or the other, I write about it anyway just to mop up the Google Juice.

If you’re in any way interested in getting a behind the scenes look at content marketing as it happens, or if you’ve ever wanted to see the buisness side of Writer Dad, come on over and check it out.

Click on the link for this week’s content marketing carnival. Or sign up for free updates delivered once a week.

Yes, we have another site in our syndicate.

But if you have kids, you’re going to LOVE it.

Have you ever been in line at the grocery store and had your son or daughter say something that made you want to melt into a puddle and then get mopped into a bucket?

Or has your child said something so funny or touching, you wished you could cast it in silver and hang it on the wall?

Good or bad, one thing seems to hold true. When our children have a memorable verbal experience, we are usually eager to share it.

Now we have a way for you to share with style!

Blogger Dad has designed what I think is our most adorable site yet.

The premise is simple. The site is called “Things My Child Says.” You can submit a quote from your child, niece, baby brother, you when you were small, the kid down the street who wears a purple shirt and runs real fast, it doesn’t matter, send it in. We’ll post it with a smile to match your own.

Along with the quote, you can send a brief introduction to give the story context, then David will post it on the site for others to see and comment on. You can send a photo to go along with the quote if you’d like, but it’s not necessary.

You can click on the submissions page for more details, but make sure to visit ThingsMyChildSays. You’ll love it. If you want free updates delivered to your inbox, click here.

NOTE: This is a guest post from Lori Hoeck from ThinkLikeABlackbelt.

In the white-water rapids of parenting – when work, visiting relatives, or perhaps that needed car repair threaten to swamp your raft – it’s hard to rearrange competing priorities.

Sometimes it’s all you can do to lift your paddle, or drag your fingers over the side.

But sometimes, there’s a tug at your attention.

“Move this one up in the queue,” it says.

• Perhaps it’s a new way of eating after a friend’s child is diagnosed with diabetes.
• Perhaps it’s a CPR class when your mom moves in with the family.
• Perhaps it’s insistence that you will all take a vacation as soon as a good deal pops up.

Today, Betsy Wuebker and I would like you to add one more thing, an understanding that will help you and your children dodge heartache, betrayal, and stress. It’s something you may have never heard of, or maybe rarely think about outside of abstract terms.

Until it’s standing dead in front of you like a wall of concrete and you find yourself going far too fast to stop.

What are we talking about?

Recognizing a narcissist.

Most times, the word “narcissist” is applied to simple ego-maniacs or attention-seekers.

But narcissists are more, much more than that.

They can make you feel guilt and demand you take the blame for all their ills. They will use every trick in the book to keep you squirming under their thumb. They finesse and skillfully manipulate situations as easily as you sip at a cup of coffee. They build themselves up at the expense of others. Their machinations can lead to feelings of dread, depression and other disorders in those with whom they’re involved.

Their need to do this, like any addictive behavior, will escalate after they’ve used up their existing narcissistic supply.  Even more frightening – the idea that one could be zeroing in on your child.

Think Venus Fly trap.
Think sweet poison.
Think primrose path.
Think predator.

As parents, we spend an inordinate amount of time concerning ourselves with boosting our child’s self-esteem. Yet few of us consider, much less know, the essential strategies we need to protect against a narcissist. And if we don’t know or consider how to protect ourselves from being victimized, how ever are we going to equip our children with the skills to do the same?

Betsy and I have written a guide that addresses just that.

In The Narcissist: A User’s Guide, we pull the rug from under a toxic dynamic that serves the narcissist while sucking the life from his prey. We help you turn the tables. Instead of being used, you can use our tips and scripts to stand your ground. And, you can teach your child to be positively assertive in the face of a probe by a narcissist, causing the predator to slink away in search of easier prey.

If you have formerly been involved with a narcissist, you already know how difficult it can be to leave the relationship. If you’re currently in a relationship with a narcissist, you may have been concerned about modeling an inappropriate perception of life in front of your child.

There’s no way to completely heal if there’s even a remote chance you might find yourself in a repeat situation.

Our guide can help.

We teach you how to spot narcissistic behavior and cover why the narcissistic response is dangerous. We include stories and anecdotes submitted by a variety of individuals who have been involved with narcissists. You may see some parallels to puzzling or frustrating behaviors within relationships you’ve experienced. Plus, we show you what to do once you’ve assessed the situation to change your responses and ultimately neutralize additional harm.

You’ll want to read The Narcissist: A User’s Guide. You may want to pass it along to someone you know. When you read it, you may recognize individuals in your own life who have displayed characteristics or have played a role in a narcissistic relationship. You’ll begin to think about arming your child with age-appropriate defenses, including additional awareness on your part, to avoid the downward spiral participating in a toxic dynamic can trigger.

Our job as parents is to acquaint our children with the good and teach them to treat it with preference.

We want to encourage our children to embrace life in an open and giving way, but we must protect their sweet natures if we wish for them grow into healthy individuals with loving relationships that thrive on reciprocity of spirit.

A narcissist has no place in all that. Let’s make sure they get out and stay out.

Download the e-book here.

I’m fat.

Not like Elvis Presley on the year I was born, with lardy ridges rolling off of my body, fat. But I’ve got work to do.

Last year was rough. Though I’ve been known to fart sunshine, I’m as human as anyone. And when my going gets low, by going likes to get eating.

Something about sitting in front of the screen, leaning back in my chair as I’m listening to the loud silence that screams my to-do’s, makes me want to shove peanut M&M’s into my mouth a handful at a time. I know they’re only low grade nuts surrounded by cheap milk chocolate, and not some magic elixir that will make everything alright or extinguish my sadness.

But just try to convince me while I’m chewing.

It also doesn’t help that I love pasta with an unhealthy appetite, and that Cindy cooks it just about better than anyone I’ve ever known.

I know I’m not alone in what I am about to say.

Somewhere around October I just gave up.

Halloween, after all, was right around the corner, and there would be plenty of candy within easy reach, with Turkey Day really just a beat behind. Then Christmas, which we all know lasts a full three weeks, would be followed by New Years.

I could always eat better in the new year!

Of course, I would’ve started the New Year with a clean slate, but my daughter’s birthday is only two weeks into January and my own is just one week after that.

Why bother trying to stay clean when there are so many obstacles clearly in my way?

Sad thing is, this is the same game I play with myself every year.

Today is February 1st.

Just like last February 1st, and all the I’m not sure how many before, I will be getting lean and eliminating sugar from my diet.

I’ve always loved the 28 Days of  February, a chance to trim up and feel my best. Four weeks of discipline, capped at the end by a lean frame and renewed vigor. Sure, I like to punch myself in the stomach without feeling a wobbly vibration, but it’s more than that.

I believe I owe it to my body to give it the best. Though I’m fairly certain I’ll be able to go all cyborg sometime before I die, I probably shouldn’t bank on it.

Yet at the end of each year, I lead myself into the same trap. Last year more so than most.

Though I’m sure next next year I’ll still be celebrating these four weeks without sugar in my diet, this will be the last 28 Days I spend undoing the mistakes I made the previous three months.

By saying this out loud, here to you, I am hopefully flipping a switch inside me.

One that will keep me doing what I’m supposed to do, even when it’s most difficult.

If you’d like to join me, I’d love the company. Hit me downstairs in the comments and I’ll tell you what Cindy and I have on the menu for the next month.

Good stuff, all you can eat. Just no sugar.

The first few days are rough, but soon you start to coast. After a few weeks, food tastes better and, sometimes, the sky even looks a little bluer.

Happy February.

We’ll get back to Four Seasons tomorrow, with July. Today I’d like to send you somewhere else. I promise it’s well worth the few minutes, and will take only about 25% of the time as one of my long-winded stories. : )

James Chartrand, of Men with Pens, has always been an inspiration to me. A frequent writer for Copyblogger, I found both his home site and Copyblogger on the same day. Both sites were featured on a list of high quality sites about writing. It was on a Sunday afternoon, maybe two away from me deciding I’d make the leap to being a writer full time. Both sides landed in my reader that day and have been visited often. The always solid writing advice on both sites, discusses not only what it takes to be a better writer, but what it takes to be a better writer online.

James revealed something at Copyblogger this morning that was deeply touching. I don’t want to say what it is, because I feel it will be best if it hits you cold, as it did me.

Thank you, James. And Bravo.

Writer Dad

Once or twice a month the four of us pile into our mini-van and head to CostCo on an afternoon quest to binge on household essentials. CostCo, like any other big box outlet selling salad dressing by the drum, is permanently overpopulated. Though I have always enjoyed our trips to CostCo once inside, I used to loathe pulling into the lot, knowing full well I would have to wage a small war to win the luxury of a decent parking space.

I’m not the type of guy willing to spend ten minutes circling for a space when I can park in an outlying section, walk a few hundred yards, and get inside while the people who pulled in behind me are still driving laps at 5 MPH. The problem with this particular CostCo is that the lot is neatly divided into two sections: teeming with tons of metal or barren wasteland. The barren wasteland is situated on the far side of a violent fault line of broken concrete and a heavy flow of incoming and outgoing traffic – not a lot of fun to cross with a cart, children or both.

Last year I stumbled upon something remarkable, and have since considered it a fine example of the Law of Attraction in motion. The problem with the Secret, and the Law of Attraction in general, is that many people assign it a magic that simply doesn’t exist.

For the last year, I have always found a parking spot in the first row, a dozen yards from the entrance. This is, by far, the most coveted row of spaces in the entire lot, and yet in our last two dozen trips to CostCo, there has only been a single instance when the row was filled and I had to park on the other side of the divide. Perhaps this is because people expect the row to be filled; it is difficult after all to believe it could be so easy. Yet every time, almost without fail, I swing to the front row and quickly claim my space. Sometimes I even have a couple to choose from.

I assume the best, hope that I’m right, and am perfectly content to circle around if not.

The law of attraction is about putting it out there and taking your shot, not about expecting wonder to rain from the sky.

Writer Dad

There are many things I love about working with David Wright, but his sense of humor might just be my favorite. This showed up in my inbox yesterday, right out of nowhere and connected to nothing. I can’t stop laughing.

Starting today, and running for the next several weeks, Dave and I are running a series over at the Inkwell on our first year online. Today’s post is “The Lies Every New Blogger Believes.” Check it out!

Today is also the first of our daily posts over at Children Write the Future. We’re kicking off our Monday – Friday publishing with a post about “How to Write Stories With Your Children.” Enjoy, and see you tomorrow!

Writer Dad