Great piece. My daughter has a great ability to read language, she can figure out by sight nearly any word thrown at her, at six. She still has to catch up on understanding each word and how the words link together to make a story. There are also lots of words at her reading level that I have to explain, and I try to remember the rule “don’t define a word with the word in the definintion”.
It’s great when she uses those words in a sentence later on, in the correct manner.

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Lance: At this point, Mia wouldn’t have it any other way. She’s the first one to notice when someone else is getting baby talked. You are absolutely right about your points. We are all human, and could at the very least connect on that level. It’s all about respect.

Mom: Thank you for never talking baby talk to me. It has made me the articulate person I am today. Of course, it’s given me quite a colorful vocabulary, and has also made me use the delete button a LOT, as the favorite words we use are not always appropriate for the Dad part of Writer Dad. Your filter has gotten much better though. Thanks, and I love you too.

Marelisa: I love it when you use the flower pot analogy. It is perfect. I want our children to be the most beautiful, bountiful plants they can be.

Sonia: Tone is exceedingly important. You can use any vocabulary, but you should be considerate of your tone. They can’t hear deep sounds as well as they can high ones, but use real syllables. As to your son, I know the precise emotion.

Patricia: What a wonderful, wonderful story. Thank you so much for sharing this. I read it a few days ago, and now again as I’m returning to answer. Beautiful, Patricia.

Laurie: Wonderful and honest. We live, learn, and do better. Thank you so much for sharing.

It has been humbling to have a child with different learning abilities and her brain works so amazingly differently…when something goes into long term memory it is essential gone for good….I would have to use a distinctive word everyday for 2 weeks and then every day for the rest of her life….if I wanted her to have a great vocabulary…thus she is unable to formulate questions or have a moral compass at the right moment….
She would always learn Uncle Friar’s BOGUS stuff! and we would hear it forever….:)
When I was thinking about teaching special ed as a career I did an internship with challenged kids ( 7 year olds) for the summer, and every Sunday I taught a pre-kindergarten class of 4-5 years olds in a different part of town. Every Sunday I was eating humble pie about what was accomplished the week before in my class.
I knew I could not do this as a career.
I think I should write an article about all the things I have learned about learning and living life from a child with a hole in the pre-frontal cortex….Wow it has been a gift that is immeasurable and always humbling.
All three of my kids challenge my thinking and that of the world around then, but in such profoundly different ways…
They all say:”Mom sometimes I can’t tell what you are trying to say?”
Better to listen!

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I prefer to explain, thoroughly and at length, exactly why I ask him to do or not to do a thing. I WANT him to question authority; I WANT him to ask why things should be that way. I WANT him to be a critical thinker, not a sheeple. I don’t want him to be another cog in the machine, another brick in the wall – I want him to know that he is doing something for a reason, not just because he is blindly following. I feel quite strongly about this – I would rather take the time to explain myself, even when it garners eye rolls and proclamations of “I would never let a child get away with that” and the accompanying implication that I am a bad parent than do what I perceive as a disservice to my child and the man he will one day be. On occasion, I will tell him “I asked, and that should suffice…” but only when there is no time to explain, and he understands that I will tell him why later. I DO understand the need for instant obedience in times of danger.

I think it’s tremendous that you explained, and I bet that had a lot to do with Writer dad’s skill and intelligence today.

Shade and Sweetwater,
K (who doesn’t bather desalinating her talk around the kid – it’s too late for that.)

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I do think I’ve read similar things that baby talk is useful . . . for babies. It’s not the dumb vocabulary, it’s using a special tone of voice. Once they start talking, no need for it any more. Like Dave, my memory’s a little muggy. :)

My little dude has always been a mighty talker. He’s 3 now, and we often hear from adults, “wow, his vocabulary is bigger than mine.” We try not to be smug. But you know, secretly, we still are.

When he asks a question, we try to answer it as fully as possible. (In this age of “Why” that can be a bit excruciating, but we try.)

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