• Writer Dad
    She needed one to make us.

    That's the best I could do, and I took the whole night to think about it.
  • megan
    ahh, I see...
    interesting.
    And what did that have to do with fathers again?
  • Writer Dad
    Yes, KittyTown, she did.
  • megan
    did Mom just compare herself to Jesus?
  • Writer Dad
    Cricket: Good luck with your life change. Change can be difficult, but it is what drives us toward something better. Blaming others only drives us in the wrong direction.

    Mom: Hi Mommy. I'm glad we grew up humble too. I never had any objection to getting all our clothes from Goodwill or the Purple Heart. I did however object to some of the selections. Seriously mom... the seventies were over.

    Seamus: That's funny. I read your lawnmower post. I can relate. My neighborhood is SO noisy, and it starts first thing in the morning. Weekends are worse. By the time it quiets enough to work, I'm too exhausted to get anything done. But I promise, my compassion is firmly in place.
  • Hey WD

    Well I had a read of the reply to Beth and I can certainly understand how these people would piss you off, especially so close to home.

    You have to wonder how or why people come to be like they are; these people who irritate you and the flashy, (potentially) heartless rich that irritate me. Nobody's created in a vacuum.

    I'm sure you're a compassionate man, and hey, if I'm allowed to get mad at my neighbours just for mowing the lawn, then I should probably say no more ;-)

    <abbr>Seamus Anthonys last blog post..The Subtle Art of Getting Jack-Shit Done</abbr>
  • Writer Dad's Mom
    Hi Sean,

    I think that the hardest thing about being on welfare was waiting in the checkout line at the grocer store. Me, a baby faced, well dressed, educated twenty-something with an above average IQ, toting four kids aged a few months through 8 years old. Judging by the looks we got, I might as well have hung a sign around my neck that read: "ignorant, baby making, leech on society." I would pretend not to see people scrutinizing our purchases, resenting the abundant array of meats, fresh produce, healthy fare - only the best that our double coupons and food stamps could buy. They never stopped to think that the beautiful $6.00 roast with 50 cents worth of potatoes and 35 cents worth of carrots would make a pot roast feast for dinner and sandwiches the next day. Two meals for a family of six - beat the heck outta one drive through meal at McDonalds. Those carefully spent food stamp dollars were stretched, sometimes it seemed, a la Jesus Christ and the loaves and fishes. Having welfare was salvation for our family during a difficult time. It enabled us to have food, shelter, medicine,care and a springboard to a brighter future. I believe that sometimes public assistance is an absolute necessity. We as a society, have a moral obligation to help those with a critical need (I am after all a child of the 60's). This, however, should serve as a temporary tool - not a life sentence. I couldn't wait to get the hell off of welfare, but this comes from having pride and self respect. You don't just pull that out of a cracker jack box (God, am I dating myself?) but must be instilled in you. While growing up in South Central LA, I never knew that we were poor. Papí had two jobs - eventually, his own store. Mom was June Cleaver. I went to the best schools (Catholic) and wore couture clothing (all hand made by Mom with homemade brown paper sack patterns). Never did I go hungry, and was quite happy with my hand me down roller skates, box of crayons and never ending supply of library books. I am grateful that you and KittyTown got to experience both sides of the financial spectrum. It gave you guys a healthy perspective and is a part of who you are today.

    Love ya,

    Mom
  • This is a wonderful post. I just began a second blog today because my life has changed. I have become that single parent. It is going to be tough and I do understand this. I was reading your post and comments. It is so important for each of us to give 100% of whatever we have back to our children (not in the form of T.V.'s) We cannot blame others nor can we accept pity and therefore live with excuses as to why we cannot be all we can be. There are many deadbeat parents out there.

    This was a wonderful post.

    <abbr>Crickets last blog post..He is leaving today</abbr>
  • Writer Dad
    PJ: That's a very kind thing to say. Thank you.

    Kouji: I think it's a great idea. I'm already excited for next year.

    Evelyn: You are correct. There are few things worse than a lack of hope.

    Ellen: It's a badge of trashiness, me thinks.
  • Writer Dad,

    Oh, I know you're not kidding. I taught high school kids who did that kind of thing. Like it's a badge of honor or something. E

    <abbr>Ellen Wilsons last blog post..Work it Like a Turkish Pop Star</abbr>
  • Definitely an interesting and alternative perspective to the dozens I have read today for Blog Action Day. Thanks for sharing your personal story and thoughts.

    What is truly poverty is the lack of hope. I believe that many of the destitutes do not believe that they have the ability to make their lives better. They'd rather rely on someone else's sweat. In so doing, they have robbed themselves of their own spirit.

    <abbr>Evelyn Lims last blog post..Should The Poor Mexican Fisherman Give Up Contentment For Cash?</abbr>
  • indeed. a family with only one parent is in a much more difficult predicament than a family with two.

    it's great that you're participating in blog action day. :)

    <abbr>kouji haikus last blog post..haiku poem</abbr>
  • Simply put, great, unique take on poverty. I couldn't agree more. I just wish I could have written it so elegantly. :)

    <abbr>PJ_Normzs last blog post..How to Properly Plan For Success Today</abbr>
  • Writer Dad
    Blogger Dad: Thanks, Dave. A parrot, I am not. Thanks for being a constant.

    Seamus Anthony: My mind is open, and I do not cast idle judgments, but I am observant and reasonably intelligent. I only speak of that which I have first hand experience. The blue box just above the one above this one has an answer to a similar question from Beth. It's a little more specific.
  • I didn't read all of the comments, so maybe other people said the same thing, but while I understand the sentiment I still believe it always pays to keep an open mind, refrain from judgment and remember that there are many shades of grey between black and white. Sure, it shits us when people are complete bludgers (Aussie term for no-job-and-don't-want-one) but how do you know what a person you see through their window looking at the wide screen is going through? They might have depression or a disability. Keep an open mind is all I am saying.
  • Wow. That was just amazing. I love how you spoke to the subject which you are familiar rather than simply parroting sentiments. That is what makes this blog such a treat.

    The more I discover about you, the more in common we seem to have, in both histories and thoughts on life. Thank you for writing this.

    david

    <abbr>Blogger Dads last blog post..Eight Questions Interview with Ron Mattocks of Clark Kent’s Lunchbox</abbr>
  • Writer Dad
    Marelisa: Michael Jordan was on Oprah a couple years back. Charles Barkley was chastising him for never giving any of his money to people who asked him on the street. Jordan said, "if they can say, Mister can you spare a dollar, then they can say, 'welcome to McDonalds.'" There is no doubt that there are some who are willing to work harder than others.

    Beth. It's my pleasure. Without dialogue, the blog is rather empty. If I lived in a wealthy neighborhood, I would have been discussing those neighbors, but I don't. Believe me, I have just as many issues on that side of the track. Don't worry, it wasn't preachy at all. Opinionated is good.

    CK Lunchbox: I'm exceedingly grateful for my humble upbringing. I believe it has a good deal to do with who I am. I went to school in the good neighborhood. A lot of those kids were spoiled, with no idea how much they had.

    BruceQ: Ooh, now I'm curious to see what was previously exchanged. Time to go comment hunting. You are absolutely correct. If they are making a choice, then we are certainly not helping by enabling them.

    Bamboo: Thanks. I wasn't exactly sure what I would write about, I just knew it would be about poverty. I realized it would be disingenuous to speak of that which I do not know. The poverty outside my porch I know well enough.
  • This was beautifully written.

    I like how you brought your own focus to the post on poverty. With so many blogs blogging on poverty today (which is a great thing) the challenge would be to make the entry unique - and you have definitely done just that.

    Well thought out, well argued. Well done. Writer Dad.

    <abbr>Bamboo Forests last blog post..7 Paths to Excessive Wealth</abbr>
  • Very cool, Sean! I like that you were able to take a subject that could easily have turned into a rant (spew?) , and instead produced a thoughtful and personal contribution to a global dialogue.

    I started to comment on Beth's post, then I realized it was Beth. She's going to think I'm a crank following her around if I argue with her any more this week. ;)

    So I'll just say this: I used to give my change to the bums who asked me for it. I used to think I was being a good guy, and helping the less fortunate, blah blah blah. Then a friend of mine pointed out that I was just "enabling" them.

    Maybe instead of raising the minimum wage, we should lower the profit margin for being a parasite.

    No question, there are a lot of good people who get slapped down by life, and they need a hand to get back up. We should help them with everything we have. But when they've given up and made the choice to live on the public dole, we're not helping anyone by giving them our money.
  • This is different spin on the situation, and one that needed to be said. I grew up much the same way you describe. Not having much teaches you to appreciate what you have but even more is the healthy pride that comes from working for it. I grateful my father passed this on to me.

    It's very hard to look at those out there who see a world that owes them something. After Katrina hit New Orleans and we inherited the refugees, there was government money being handed out left and right. People decided to make this their home, but when it dried up things got ugly. I don't mean to generalize in my comments concerning the victims, but when there was no more assistance left, it was hard to tell who needed and help and who was taking advantage. It was very sad on many levels.

    <abbr>CK Lunchboxs last blog post..Detour: Interview At Blogger Dad!</abbr>
  • Writer Dad, thanks for taking the time to explain. I'm sure that situation with your house was very frustrating.

    These people are easy to judge because we can see what's happening. It is horrible to see children treated the way those children are treated.

    But I dislike the way this country (not necessarily you) demonizes poor people who neglect or abuse their children. There are plenty of rich people who do the same, like the father of the Miss America who abused her. I've known lots of women who've been sexually and physically abused, and their abusers generally got away with it. I think we tend to single out the poor in this regard because they're getting monetary support.

    I think we should all try to educate ourselves about how hard it can be to be on welfare, especially people like me who have never been poor to speak of. I've read lots of stories about the difficulties of navigating the system. For example, Section 8 housing is not that easy to find, and it may not be anywhere near where one gets a $7/hour job that doesn't cover the cost of child care. I sympathize with the man mentioned by Marelisa who would rather beg than get a job at McDonald's. Wages in the United States have not kept up with the cost of living.

    I also believe that there will always be people who need to be taken care of. They may not be the "deserving poor," but we should do as much as we can to help them, at least in the interests of their children.

    Hope this comment isn't too preachy.

    <abbr>Beth Partins last blog post..Blog Action Day 2008 Poverty</abbr>
  • Hi Sean: There are those for whom being on welfare is extraordinarily difficult and they fight hard to get out of welfare, while there are those who basically sit back on their laurels and collect their checks. I wrote about this in a comment on Vered's blog awhile back: I once watched a special where a man begging for money stated that he made more money begging than he would flipping burgers at McDonald's, so why should he bother to get a job? Then there are those who want nothing more in this world than to have a job and be self-sufficient but there are simply no jobs to be found. I don't believe that everyone is created equal.
  • Writer Dad
    Beth: I sure have. Every day. I'm not demonizing poor people, I'm reporting what I see in front of me. There are hundreds of hard working families in my neighborhood, I mention them in the post. The issue I have is with a select part of the population. Here are two examples:

    Across the street from me, there lives a woman. She lives in an apartment with three children. In the three years we've lived here, we see her leave the house only to walk to the liquor store for beer. Her housing is Section 8. She brags to anyone who will listen that she only pays a "hundra" dollars for rent. Her children are filthy, and regularly play in the street. She buys them firecrackers which they ignite in our trashcan. Her TV is large, and she has no curtains. It is on all day, and anytime we are so inclined we can see what she is watching. One could make an assumption, perhaps, that she does not know better, but alas, she went to the same middle school that I did, at the same time.

    When we moved into the house, there was a family living upstairs. They did not pay rent, for three months, and we had to evict them. We could not have been more patient or understanding. The dad worked but spent all his money on beer and video games. The mom pretended not to speak English whenever I knocked on the door. Their big screen TV could only have been bigger if it was manufactured in the room. I had to warn them for two months, because the last thing I wanted to do was have them forcibly evicted. That is what I had to do. When the police came to evict them, their baby was crawling through a pile of garbage. I said to the one of the police officers, "You must hate this part of the job." She said, "Nope. Most of these situations are exactly the same. These people get someone to fill out a rental application for them, they live for free for a few months, then get kicked out, and move on to somewhere else." They still live on our street, have lived in four places in three years, and only payed a few months rent. The mom, I have since found out, speaks perfect English, was born and raised in this city, and went to the best high school in our city.

    My neighborhood is filled with such examples. I wrote what I know, not what I speculated.

    I appreciate you asking the question. Thanks, Beth.

    Maya: My absolute pleasure. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
  • What a wonderful perspective.
    Thank you for this post!

    <abbr>Mayas last blog post..The key to happiness and balance is right with you, just learn to use it - Part 2 of the thinkmaya framework</abbr>
  • Writer Dad,

    I have mixed feelings about this post. In some ways it reminds of all the talk about welfare queens in the 1980s, when Reagan was demonizing poor people. Have you spent much time with the people who have the big-screen TVs? Do they tell you what their lives are like?

    <abbr>Beths last blog post..Wandering Around Uptown II</abbr>
  • Writer Dad
    Steph: Our neighborhoods sound a bit similar, though I have to admit, our wasn't so apathetic when we moved in. It's definitely declined over the last couple years. The elderly couple that you describe, is a regular sight on my street. Not them exactly, but the hard working family's sandwiched between the lazy people, literally waiting for their check. I have one set of neighbors; they're on assistance, their two year child is always dirty (and eating something like ice cream), and they drive a two year old BMW. Crazy, that. I know not everybody is as smart as the pursuit of happyness guy, and that that isn't a reality for everyone. But it is for some, and too many make excuses.

    Sal: I'll be over.

    Kimmelin: Always a pleasure, Kimmelin. I loved Graham's story as well. It touched on something that I couldn't hope to. I'm with you on teaching our children. Sometimes, I'm thankful we live in the neighborhood we do for exactly that reason. Some of the kids on the other side of town aren't very nice, for an entirely different set of reasons.

    Melissa: I believe we're on the brink of change, even if that change is a decade on the horizon. Those of us who do believe, need to say it out loud. Otherwise, we'll never render hope to reality.

    Vered: Always a pleasure, Vered.

    Janice: If the shoe fits... I could have one thesaurus piled on top of another, in a dozen different languages. Sloth is still the best word. I hope it never disappears from circulation entirely.
  • Sloth....a word that is almost PC'd out of circulation.

    Excellent post. I love the Peale quote too. Truer words never spoken.
  • What an interesting perspective, Sean. Thank you for sharing it with us.
  • This post breaks my heart. I know well those households in which people gaze idly at a big screen television and I know well that it is true apathy and numbness to others that creates these households. Sometimes, the pain of the outside world is just too much to take, and people would rather escape the harsh reality. Other times, it's a raw lack of compassion for others (yes, even their own children). To mend my heart, I keep my eyes and ears tuned in to those who are taking a stand, taking action, and making a difference. That's how I keep hope alive.

    <abbr>Melissa Donovans last blog post..Writing for Animals</abbr>
  • Lovely post, WD. Thanks.

    And Graham - thanks for sharing that story. With my children, just 5, 4 and 2, I'm already trying to get them to understand the concept of hungry children in places like Africa. In vain, I pull up pictures and videos on the internet...hoping to help them realize that my family's reality is not the same as everyone's around the world. I know my children are too young to grasp this concept in entirety, but I'm determined to get it to seep into their realm of understanding over time.

    <abbr>Kimmelins last blog post..Daddy’s Wiggler Jiggler</abbr>
  • Shit. I mean CHOOSE, not chose, responsibility and honour.

    <abbr>stephs last blog post..The Power of Being Open</abbr>
  • Sal
    @WD: Exactly. If you get a chance, check out my blog, I go more into it for BAD08.

    <abbr>Sals last blog post..Parenting Poverty</abbr>
  • This post hits home for me. Our first house was next door to one of the many gov. housing complexes in this town. Every day, as Colin and I slogged at sometimes three jobs at once to survive, frustrated that our education was so costly and that we had been struggling for years to get even this far, we would have to hear domestic fights, punk kids, even people on the phone screaming that their cheque hadn't arrived yet. The typical scene was tossed-out furniture to the curb that was nicer than ours, big-screens and new furniture being delivered by a rent-to-own store or Leons, recycling boxes of liquor and beer bottles and other junk, and garbage strewn literally everywhere. Trashy women and men sat on their porches in the afternoon, in wifebeaters and muumus, drinking Tim Hortons and smoking.

    I was pissed off all the time because our place was often vandalized, though so were their own places. We knew the kids of the neighbourhood because their names were always being screeched by deadbeat mothers. The cops practically parked there permanently. There were drug busts and fires and arrests and loose dogs. I grew bitter and hateful and when I found out that one family had lived there for three generations so far, I was so freaking angry.

    Then one day I noticed a respectable looking elderly man and woman emerge from one of the townhouses in the middle. Their porch was usually clean, they had simple curtains in the kitchen window, and they kept a sign on their door asking that the others not dump their miscellaneous bikes, strollers, and other garbage. I realized that in the midst of this stereotypical scenario lived a couple that ended up there under different circumstances. They were low or no income but didn't act like it, I saw. I felt terrible for them. This makes me agree with Miguel that it's not all black and white, or stereotypical, though certainly there are those who perpetuate the welfare stereotype.

    After working our butts off but to no avail, Colin and I lost that house after three years and had to go back to an apt that was no better, since we lived above a domestically violent and abusive very young couple (trying to get pregnant!), and a drunk jerk (no, really, he was such a jerk!) who had left his family.

    Belleville has one of the highest percentages in Ontario, if not Canada, of single teenage moms. One of my jobs was to type out cases for a psychologist who did parenting capacity assessments for the hundreds who ended up in court for being negligible and abusive parents. I cried a lot doing that job. The parents suck and the children often end up like them. And sometimes it was the foster parents who were abusive!

    But in the end, it all comes down to choice. On the one hand you have the Pursuit of Happyness guy; on the other, the one who takes his cheque and doesn't even try to get a job. And in between you have everyone struggling in their own ways.

    All we have to decide, as Gandalf said, is what to do with the time that is given us. No matter what our circumstances. Hopefully, we chose responsibility and honour.

    <abbr>stephs last blog post..The Power of Being Open</abbr>
  • Writer Dad
    Betsy: Start early and finish strong, right?

    Miguel: Thank you. It was a lot of fun.

    Oktober Five: Risk is hard, but often yields the best reward.

    Jamie: True that, Jamie.

    B. Wilde: Met him for the first time at thirty-four? Wow. I had a girlfriend when I was fifteen who passed due to a burst appendix. The first time her father saw her since she was a baby was at her funeral. I could barely look at the guy.

    Wendi: As fathers, we set the template for what our daughters expect. It is our duty to make sure that we craft the finest example possible.

    Jamie: It's more than a shame. I'd say it's a disaster.

    Lori: Hi Space Age! Absolutely true. I'd say my neighborhood's divided right down the middle.

    Tammy: There is nothing you can buy that will fill the void. At their best, such purchases are just a handful of dirt in the chasm.

    Ellen: There are guys in my neighborhood, I kid you not, that have sired children in several tenements. They give a bad name to all the people who so legitimately need a helping hand. I'm sorry for your trials.

    Chris: That sounds so noble, Chris. I hope you can make that happen.

    Sal: I don't think you're belittling women at all. You are saying that we set the design for our future, and it's our job to put care into what we're crafting. Great comment, Sal.
  • Sal
    As fathers, we need to take a stand, and take back what is ours. I don't mean this in a way to belittle women, but seriously guys. How do we expect to help our sons reach manhood when we can't even teach them what boyhood should be? When we can't show them what it means to be a man, and I don't mean a man that gambles away his family's money or spends it at a nudy bar everyday after work?

    And our daughters, how are we supposed to show them what a real man should be? Fathers, date your daughters, take them out to dinner, pull out their chair, open the doors for them, but also, teach them to be appreciative of it, ALWAYS. My daughter, everytime I open a door for her, she says "Thank you daddy," hugs my legs and then walks inside.

    It is a poverty of being who and what you were made to be, a parent.

    <abbr>Sals last blog post..Human Dating and Courting Rituals of Birds</abbr>
  • I've seen and felt poverty. This is one of the reason I teach and more reason why I want to start my own school in the Philippines, to help break this vicious cycle.

    Money without education means nothing, therefore Education is the key.

    <abbr>Chriss last blog post..The Morning Ride</abbr>
  • Writer Dad,

    So glad you took this angle today.

    I went on welfare when I was trying to get through college and raise my son. By myself. I was one of those scapegoated single moms. I hated taking my food stamps into the grocery store and would always glance behind me to see who stood behind me.

    I would get so angry when politicians would scream about cutting funds to "lazy" welfare mothers when I stayed up late studying trying hard to make a better life for ourselves.

    I had a lot of poverty back then. And I saw how easy a target all of us single mothers were who were working very hard. Why don't they go after these deadbeat dads, I thought. Why do they spend all this time picking on us when these guys could be helping us out?

    <abbr>Ellen Wilsons last blog post..Work it Like a Turkish Pop Star</abbr>
  • I totally agree with the father issue. I had a father that was never around. As a adult, I was able to forgive him, and allow him back. My brothers have not been so forgiving. My mom always tried to "buy" things to fill the voids. You touched on this above in a different way when you mentioned big screen t.v.'s above. If the truth be known, they are probably filling their own voids in their daily lives.

    Another great post.

    <abbr>Tammy Warrens last blog post..My Attentive Heart...do you have one?</abbr>
  • Sean --
    I think poverty can be self inflicted with a victim-like attitude, but there are some who really do suffer poverty through little fault of their own. Some people need a new mindset; some need our helping hand. We have the luxury in deciding where we put out our helping hand.
    Lori

    <abbr>SpaceAgeSage -- Loris last blog post..Yes, I survived the week-long media fast — and learned lots!</abbr>
  • As a home health nurse for many>/i> years, I too saw way too many of these big-screen-tv/ welfare-check households. Many of them were teaching their children to do the same. In frustration, I often called it generations of stupid, because they were content to continue in their poverty because they had pain pills, a ride to the doctor's, cable tv, cigarettes, and beer/soda in the fridge.

    They really didn't want for much, so they taught their children to live the same. It truly is a shame.

    <abbr>Jamie Simmermans last blog post..Skinny Souls: Blog Action Day</abbr>
  • Sean,

    You are SO right. My dad left when I was 12 and left a gaping hole that I had to climb a long time to get out of. All of my kids are very lucky to have great relationships with their fathers. It is such a blessing.

    Especially girls...need to know they are loved by their fathers, it sets such an important role model.

    <abbr>Wendi Kelly-Life's Little Inspirationss last blog post..My Dog Missed the Memo</abbr>
  • The absence of fathers is a bit of an epidemic in our society. My father did not marry my mother and I met him for the first time in 2002. I was 34 at the time. It was a tough experience. Fortunately for me, my grandparents and my mom worked hard to carry their own load. It wasn't easy at times for them. Interestingly, after meeting him, I discovered that I think I was better off not having him in my life while I was growing up. This doesn't mean that I favor fathers being absent. Each situation is different, but pulling your own load regardless of the circumstances is certainly a sound principle that applies to everyone.

    <abbr>B.Wildes last blog post..Brief Encounters with Miss Addie</abbr>

  • Now there is a poverty eating part of our population; they who think it’s acceptable to have a child and then leave it to chance.


    The absence of fathers from so many young lives is a real tragedy. This doesn't apply only to fathers outside the home but those who remain and wall themselves off from their children.

    Great post, Sean.

    <abbr>Jamie Grove - How Not To Writes last blog post..The Poverty of Distance</abbr>
  • The story about your parents gives me motivation to try something different or even risky. I'm currently in an unemployment "fling" as I like to call it, and instead of feeling like it limits me, I'm looking at it as an opportunity--a place where my options are more open than they have ever been.
  • and thanks, oopsies

    <abbr>Miguel de Luiss last blog post..Generosity is of the brave.</abbr>
  • WriterDad

    I will answer, but I'm medicating myself against a Vanity Fit :D

    <abbr>Miguel de Luiss last blog post..Generosity is of the brave.</abbr>
  • The paucity of spirit - you identified it where it begins. At home. Thank you.

    <abbr>Betsy Wuebkers last blog post..ENERGY</abbr>
  • Writer Dad
    Dereck: Thanks. I can only write what I know.

    Matthew: Twist your thoughts into a post.

    Barbara: Thanks, Barbara. It is a valuable perspective to think that our mind can push us to where we need to be.

    Miguel: You are absolutely correct; nothing is so black and white. However, I believe what he is saying is that sometimes circumstances ask us to pull from inside us rather than what's around us. I know plenty of people who have grown up with plenty of wealth and opportunity only to squander it without appreciation. I've also known others who have used their poverty to climb the depths.

    I saw your blog last night, and it made me smile from ear to ear. Thanks for the review. It was a lot of fun. I'll be back over to comment this morning. I was so tired last night, I didn't feel like my thoughts were clear. I will say that I think you have a very special blog; there's no one out there (that I've seen) that's like you. I love your personal page, I love your layout, and I adore that you do it in two languages. I can't even imagine the skill and dedication that must take. You're special Miguel, and I'm glad you're a part of what's happening here. Thanks.

    J.D.: I would have felt like a sham writing about things in Africa. I felt like others could do it far better than me.

    Lance: I see it everyday. These boys without fathers, the saunter through our streets without any respect, then they do things like slap stickers on stop signs. : > )

    Eric: I'm in no way trying to be cold. I'm simply speaking about what happens outside my window.

    Chase: No doubt, Chase. We know a couple that's going through a divorce right now, and the kid is getting dragged through the brambles. No matter who he's with, he hears unkind things about the other. I can't even fathom how that decays his outlook.

    Graham: It's going to be difficult to beat this comment today, Graham. That's an easy story to picture; quite haunting. I almost want to turn it into a short story. Thank you for sharing it.
  • Hey Writer Dad,

    My father always told me "finish everything on your plate -- there are kids in Africa who won't eat today". "Then send it to them," I said once. (Just once...)

    I went to Africa and saw first-hand. It is not like the movies, but the movies don't quite lie either.

    We sat on the steps of a café in Dar Es Salaam eating chicken and rice. Huge helpings. Even as backpackers used to eating when we could (because there would be times we couldn't) we were too full to finish. But on the steps of this café, there were kids quietly, patiently waiting. We saw one person at a table give the rest of his plate to a child on the steps. And another. And then we did the same.

    I sent the plate I couldn't finish to Africa. Somehow one of the happiest and saddest moments in my life.

    ~Graham

    <abbr>Graham Strongs last blog post..We’re Moving!</abbr>
  • Fathers need to be in their childrens' lives.

    Kids need their dads.

    Single mothers need to realize this and make sure that there is a relationship between their children and their ex. It might be uncomfortable for both parents to have to be in constant contact, but it is worth a little discomfort for the sake of the children.

    Fractured families are still FAMILIES and need to act like it.

    That's my 2 cents.

    <abbr>Chase Marchs last blog post..Poverty in Schools</abbr>
  • I appreciate you writing about this particular aspect of 'poverty'. I think it's an unpopular perspective because it may seem cold to some. But it is a fact of life that needs to be addressed none the less. Eric.

    <abbr>Eric Hamms last blog post..Blog Action Day 2008: The Many Faces Of Poverty</abbr>
  • Thanks for sharing this perspective Sean. You bring up a point I think gets missed by many along the way - the importance of both parents in a family. Mothers are there usually - it's the fathers who sometimes (too often) jump ship. Only to steer their children (children they don't even know) into a life less than they should have...and a poverty in more ways than one.

    Thanks for spreading the word on poverty, and helping to keep this in the forefront of people's minds.

    <abbr>Lances last blog post..Life’s A Balancing Act</abbr>
  • I like that you write about what you know. Nothing beats first hand perspectives.

    <abbr>J.D. Meiers last blog post..How To Overcome Mistrust</abbr>
  • I disagree with the quote. I also grew up in a not so nice part of town. And I don't think things are so black or white.

    Anyway, writerdad, I think you could be visiting my blog today. I wonder why.

    <abbr>Miguel de Luiss last blog post..Wee review: “Lucas Bright: I Know I’m Special”</abbr>
  • Hi Writer Dad - I love how you started this post with the Norman Vincent Peale quote. It's so fitting for the beautiful and honest story you wrote.

    <abbr>Barbara Swaffords last blog post..Blogging - Is It A Cure For Insomnia</abbr>
  • I see a lot of hard-working single moms where I live. And an even larger amount of deadbeat dads. It sickens me. I cannot fathom how it is possible for someone to not support their child the way they are suppose to, the way that they should.

    There are so many angry things I could write about this, but I will stop here.
  • Bravo! Terrific post. Not only did I enjoy your personal testimony, but also your conclusions.

    <abbr>Dereck Coatneys last blog post..An Open Letter to the Reddit Community</abbr>
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