“It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn’t.”
~Barbara Kingsolver
“Mia, You need to stop that! You are almost seven years old.”
The moment the words left my lips, I felt them at the tips of my toes, crackling through my body the entire trip down. The room felt colder and the walls looked a little darker; as though the sun had ducked behind a cloud, or perhaps my eyes were just a bit more tired.
Mia isn’t seven, and won’t be for another couple of months. She is, however, at the perfect age where Daisy and I can effectively use the pending candle as a talking point; the perfect age to expect the behavior required of a seven year old without having to relinquish all the benefits.
What wilted something inside me in that moment, as the words seven years old fell from my tongue for the first time, was that the seven at that second may as well have had a teen attached to its tail.
Daisy and I brought Mia home from the hospital yesterday, and were married just the day before. Max, it seems, has only been with us for hours.
The last seven years have not fallen like leaves in Autumn, drifting gently toward a crumbling sidewalk. They have been captured by the truculent wind of a rapidly changing season, sweeping our rituals and twisting them into memories.
I adore all the ideas our tomorrow might bring, but will gladly wait for the blossoms to bloom.
Daisy took a picture of Mia later in the day. The perfect shot, you know the one. When our child is caught unaware, and all their soul is on display. Sometimes we see things different through the second hand eyes of a photograph. In this particular stolen moment, Mia is drawing. She still looks little enough to be my baby, but big enough to make me wince. Her face was a little thinner, her hair a little longer (falling across her cheeks like a shadows), and her expression a bit more knowing.
She still cannot wait to crawl into my lap, and thinks most everything I say is funny. She believes I am the most handsome of all men, and knows beyond doubt that I love her without question. Her innocence is almost entirely intact, and her intelligent curiosity is bursting at the seams.
I know that no day is longer than another, and that time marches in only one direction, but knowing my moments are fleeting is enough to keep me mindful.
I’m surprised to find my eyes moist as I finish this thought; crying is a rarity while I write. I do not feel sad. Just tender, and perhaps a bit raw. I feel the sands of the hourglass trying to bury me, as I burn my minutes in an endeavor to make them one day abundant.
My eyes are moist, but I am not crying.
The tears are there, but not a single one has fallen. I do not think they will. At least not right now.
I am sure they will spill when I read these words out loud to Daisy this evening. That is when they will feel the most real.
Writer Dad
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Namas Daisy says “No Rain, No Rainbows.”
About Sean Platt
I am still on ‘this’ side of having children, but I remember how I felt as a child – and how quickly time flew and still does fly. My big year was the year 2000. Ever since I was in elementary, 2000 seemed so far away. (The year of my high school graduation.) Now it seems I blinked and 2000 whipped right by.
I’m starting to get nostalgic when I look at neices and nephews who grow so quickly in between our visits.
I’m not a parent, but I so ‘felt’ this post, Sean.
Hayden Tompkinss last blog post..The Courage to Leap
I am still on ‘this’ side of having children, but I remember how I felt as a child – and how quickly time flew and still does fly. My big year was the year 2000. Ever since I was in elementary, 2000 seemed so far away. (The year of my high school graduation.) Now it seems I blinked and 2000 whipped right by.
I’m starting to get nostalgic when I look at neices and nephews who grow so quickly in between our visits.
I’m not a parent, but I so ‘felt’ this post, Sean.
Hayden Tompkinss last blog post..The Courage to Leap
Hi Seany, I remember many, many years ago talking to another mom, who told me the defining moment was when she looked at her “little boy” and saw hair on his leg! She knew that things were about to radically change. Maybe that is why I had such a hard time being a disciplinarian with you guys . I just wanted to play with you and enjoy the childhood years as much as I could. There is plenty of time in the future for chores, rules and responsibilities, but the reckless abandon of foolishnes can never be fully recaptured!You and KittyTown will always be my babies , so forgive me if sometimes I just want to squeeze into your busy schedules a little more than there is time for… and forgive me if I want to reside in never-never-land. Luv ya, mom.
Hi Seany, I remember many, many years ago talking to another mom, who told me the defining moment was when she looked at her “little boy” and saw hair on his leg! She knew that things were about to radically change. Maybe that is why I had such a hard time being a disciplinarian with you guys . I just wanted to play with you and enjoy the childhood years as much as I could. There is plenty of time in the future for chores, rules and responsibilities, but the reckless abandon of foolishnes can never be fully recaptured!You and KittyTown will always be my babies , so forgive me if sometimes I just want to squeeze into your busy schedules a little more than there is time for… and forgive me if I want to reside in never-never-land. Luv ya, mom.
I read yesterday something along these lines: we trade our time for money, but time is worth so much more than money. I know that my sister is torn between wanting to see her two little boys grow stronger and wiser each day, and wanting them to stay small at the same time.
I read yesterday something along these lines: we trade our time for money, but time is worth so much more than money. I know that my sister is torn between wanting to see her two little boys grow stronger and wiser each day, and wanting them to stay small at the same time.
Lovely writing and thoughts to share today. I share life with 29,25,22 year old daughters and all three are Daddy’s little girls and I am sure they will be for the rest of their lives. My honey had to work a great deal of the time and I am sure he has regrets for the time he was away from his kiddos, but on the other hand he was determined to work harder to help them achieve their dreams too….there is an honoring between child and parent that has nothing to do with time.
My friend was just the greatest mom and her two live far away, nearer to – spending the most time and energy on their step mom – who’s to say…we just need to enjoy what comes and celebrate the tenderness and the love. I send a little prayer up for all the adoptees who have abandoned those who lovingly parented them – not uncommon enough.
Patricias last blog post..Hats Off to The Ladies of The Club
Lovely writing and thoughts to share today. I share life with 29,25,22 year old daughters and all three are Daddy’s little girls and I am sure they will be for the rest of their lives. My honey had to work a great deal of the time and I am sure he has regrets for the time he was away from his kiddos, but on the other hand he was determined to work harder to help them achieve their dreams too….there is an honoring between child and parent that has nothing to do with time.
My friend was just the greatest mom and her two live far away, nearer to – spending the most time and energy on their step mom – who’s to say…we just need to enjoy what comes and celebrate the tenderness and the love. I send a little prayer up for all the adoptees who have abandoned those who lovingly parented them – not uncommon enough.
Patricias last blog post..Hats Off to The Ladies of The Club
“knowing my moments are fleeting is enough to keep me mindful.”
Mindful is good. It’s positive.
I often feel desperate.
“knowing my moments are fleeting is enough to keep me mindful.”
Mindful is good. It’s positive.
I often feel desperate.
So when I don’t leave a link but use my site’s name, am I showing sincerity?
:-)
So when I don’t leave a link but use my site’s name, am I showing sincerity?
:-)
What a beautiful piece of writing. Hold Daisy close.
jamies last blog post..Oh, snap! Tips for taking kid- and travel- worthy photos
What a beautiful piece of writing. Hold Daisy close.
jamies last blog post..Oh, snap! Tips for taking kid- and travel- worthy photos
Elli: Sorry I missed you earlier. You were in the moderation zone. Ah, two…. where did those days go. We never had the terrible twos, they were all terrific. The threes however, that’s another story! It is indeed a tremendous ride.
Lance: I think I know exactly how I’m going to feel in a few years when they start to slowly slip away. I try to make sure that every moment matters, and tomorrow will be a slow burn and not a raging fire. If Max, at nine, did not want to hold my hand I would both understand and be terribly sad. Laurie’s words gave me chills as well.
Kelly: Why CAN’T time just take a break sometimes. Sure would solve an awful lot of problems. Sorry for making you sniff.
Hayden: Having someone without children “feel” my post makes me feel awesome. Thanks, Hayden!
Mom: You are forgiven. Did you know as you were writing that that you would drop by unannounced two hours later, or was it just a lucky coincidence? I love you too, and your new phone looks adorable.
Marelisa: I want them to grow, I just want the Earth to orbit at half speed.
Patricia: Thanks, Patricia. It’s good to know that they don’t always drift away. I don’t want any regrets. It’s why I’m willing to work so hard now. I want to earn the tie that will buy me the freedom to slow down.
Vered: You are just too adorable. You should always leave your link behind. I would never question your sincerity. I will stop being silly and do exactly the same.
Jamie: Indeed I do. Every single day.
Elli: Sorry I missed you earlier. You were in the moderation zone. Ah, two…. where did those days go. We never had the terrible twos, they were all terrific. The threes however, that’s another story! It is indeed a tremendous ride.
Lance: I think I know exactly how I’m going to feel in a few years when they start to slowly slip away. I try to make sure that every moment matters, and tomorrow will be a slow burn and not a raging fire. If Max, at nine, did not want to hold my hand I would both understand and be terribly sad. Laurie’s words gave me chills as well.
Kelly: Why CAN’T time just take a break sometimes. Sure would solve an awful lot of problems. Sorry for making you sniff.
Hayden: Having someone without children “feel” my post makes me feel awesome. Thanks, Hayden!
Mom: You are forgiven. Did you know as you were writing that that you would drop by unannounced two hours later, or was it just a lucky coincidence? I love you too, and your new phone looks adorable.
Marelisa: I want them to grow, I just want the Earth to orbit at half speed.
Patricia: Thanks, Patricia. It’s good to know that they don’t always drift away. I don’t want any regrets. It’s why I’m willing to work so hard now. I want to earn the tie that will buy me the freedom to slow down.
Vered: You are just too adorable. You should always leave your link behind. I would never question your sincerity. I will stop being silly and do exactly the same.
Jamie: Indeed I do. Every single day.
That was very nice Sean.
Sometimes you just can’t help the tears. It has happened to me on a few of my posts too. Those are my favorites.
Then agian there are some posts that bring tears to my eyes for entirely the wrong reasons. We won’t talk about them. :)
malathionmans last blog post..Sign of the Times
That was very nice Sean.
Sometimes you just can’t help the tears. It has happened to me on a few of my posts too. Those are my favorites.
Then agian there are some posts that bring tears to my eyes for entirely the wrong reasons. We won’t talk about them. :)
malathionmans last blog post..Sign of the Times
Sean,
I had my kids in groups. The first two are 31 and 27 and the second group are 14 and 11. I had the second group on purpose because one christmas day as I sat under the tree with these two teenagers, I just couldn’t imagine a life NOT surrounded by the beauty of children.
It happens so fast.
I fixed it alright. Now I have kids and grand-kids the same age…. I think I got it covered till I die…:)
Nice post.
Wendi Kelly-Life’s Little Inspirationss last blog post..High Flying Faith
Sean,
I had my kids in groups. The first two are 31 and 27 and the second group are 14 and 11. I had the second group on purpose because one christmas day as I sat under the tree with these two teenagers, I just couldn’t imagine a life NOT surrounded by the beauty of children.
It happens so fast.
I fixed it alright. Now I have kids and grand-kids the same age…. I think I got it covered till I die…:)
Nice post.
Wendi Kelly-Life’s Little Inspirationss last blog post..High Flying Faith
Wendy, that is such a great idea, I think I might do the same thing.
Ellis last blog post..Why it’s not your fault when your credit card is maxed out – and what you should do about it.
Wendy, that is such a great idea, I think I might do the same thing.
Ellis last blog post..Why it’s not your fault when your credit card is maxed out – and what you should do about it.
@Elli: Will you? Well… good to know. :-D – Anyway, darling, I’ll be home sooner, as the library is closing sooner and I take home the book that I need for tomorrow.
@Elli: Will you? Well… good to know. :-D – Anyway, darling, I’ll be home sooner, as the library is closing sooner and I take home the book that I need for tomorrow.
Once again, you have captured so much about your kids. The quote by Barbara Kingsolver is oh so true. Like you, I hate to see them grow up, but if they didn’t grow and change and become a little more independent with each passing day, I think they would kill me before I reached the age of sixty.
B. Wildes last blog post..Parenting Advice – Beware of Halloween Treats
Once again, you have captured so much about your kids. The quote by Barbara Kingsolver is oh so true. Like you, I hate to see them grow up, but if they didn’t grow and change and become a little more independent with each passing day, I think they would kill me before I reached the age of sixty.
B. Wildes last blog post..Parenting Advice – Beware of Halloween Treats
What a wonderful piece, a wonderful quote, and a wonderful picture that fits perfectly. I will forward this to my girlfriend. I know she can write like this. She says she wants to, but somehow never gets started.
What a wonderful piece, a wonderful quote, and a wonderful picture that fits perfectly. I will forward this to my girlfriend. I know she can write like this. She says she wants to, but somehow never gets started.
Malathionman: Thanks. I have the second kind as well.
Wendi: That’s amazing. My dad has sets as well, but for different reasons. I have ten year old twin sisters, as well as a sister who is a bit older than I. My daughter is just a few years younger than my sister.
B. Wilde: True, that. And thank you.
Ned: All it takes is a good start. Our brains will take care of the rest. I only started a year ago. It took six months to really get going, but now it feels like drawing breath. I wish your girlfriend well.
Malathionman: Thanks. I have the second kind as well.
Wendi: That’s amazing. My dad has sets as well, but for different reasons. I have ten year old twin sisters, as well as a sister who is a bit older than I. My daughter is just a few years younger than my sister.
B. Wilde: True, that. And thank you.
Ned: All it takes is a good start. Our brains will take care of the rest. I only started a year ago. It took six months to really get going, but now it feels like drawing breath. I wish your girlfriend well.