“If a fellow isn’t thankful for what he’s got, he isn’t likely to be thankful for what he’s going to get.”
~Frank A. Clark
“Is it going to hurt?”
Max furrowed his tiny brow.
“No,” I said. ”It’s going to pinch.”
“Like this?”
He pinched me, certain I’m sure, that he sent my forearm into burning agony, but it’s more like the whisper of a dandelion settling on my skin.
“No,” I said. ”Like this.”
I gave Max’s arm a nip; a close approximation to what the shot might feel like.”
“Ow.”
“Did it hurt?”
“A little bit.”
“Not too much?”
“This much.” Max squeezed his thumb and pointer, leaving just enough room for a ladybug to slip through, but only so long as her wings were folded. ”Why do I have to get a shot.”
“Because they put a few tiny bad guys inside you, so like a million good guys can beat them up and tell them to never come back.”
“Then I won’t get sick?”
“Right.”
“I’m not going to cry,” Max said. He shook his head.
“It’s okay if you do.”
“Yeah….” He held the last syllable like a note on a trumpet. ”I don’t think I’m going to.”
We’ve been stuck in the tiny room with the long sheet of butcher paper for the better part of an hour. Just me and the three year old. We have a trio of books, and we’ve read each several times. I’ve already made the tongue depressors dance, and fashioned a set of chicken balloons from the disposable gloves. I know I should stay out of the doctor’s stuff, but forty-five minutes is a long time.
I start to wonder what it’s like to have the seemingly infinite power of a doctor. I picture him next door, flirting with the nurse, or maybe dinking around with his iphone.
We had an appointment, and there was no one before us. What’s taking so long?
Forty-five minutes waiting in a tiny room with a three year old is like an afternoon in an elevator.
“What’s taking such a long long time?”
Max’s question is reasonable, but it’s turning into a whine.
“Sorry buddy,” I tousle his hair, “I’m sure the doctor will be here soon.”
“Okay.” His shoulders collapse and he crawls in my lap.
I feel about doctors as I do about contractors. I’m not happy I have to bend over every time I want to do business, but I accept it.
They went to med school, I didn’t. They have a skill set that I do not.
But don’t make my three year old wait without a good reason.
That’s not cool.
I tell Max I’ll be back; he promises not to budge. I step into the hallway.
The nurse has misfiled our paperwork, and the doctor doesn’t know we’re waiting.
Grrr.
Fifteen minutes later, the derelict nurse enters. He says, as he displays the needle, “Sorry guys, this is my first day.” He then approaches Max with the self assurance of a tourist without a map in a country without vowels.
“Have you given a shot before?” I shift my body. The nurse has to stop. I’m not trying to be confrontational, but I’m quite suddenly unhappy.
“Not on a kid.” He won’t look me in the eye.
“I’m sure you’ll be an ace someday,” I said. ”But we’ve been waiting for an hour, and I think we need another nurse.”
“Sure thing,” he said.
He shuts the door and I feel angry with myself for not giving him the benefit, but I’m doing the right thing.
The door swings open a minute later and a woman walks in who looks like she was giving shots back when they were wiping out polio.
“How are ya little guy?” The nurse smiles and every one of her hundred wrinkles reach for the ceiling.
“Good.” Max laughs.
“This is going to pinch a little, okay.”
Max looks at me and whispers. ”I’m not going to cry.”
“Okay, buddy.” I offer my palm. ”Do you want to hold my hand?”
“Yeah.”
“Look at me, okay.”
“Okay.”
Max holds my gaze as the needle breaks, then enters his flesh. His eyes widen, brighten, then glaze. The nurse finishes her work, and removes the needle.
“All done,” I said.
Max turned to the nurse with two dry cheeks. ”Thank you for my shot.”
This sounds like the most polite sentence ever whispered.
The nurse spins in surprise, clearly trying to determine an appropriate response. But, “You’re welcome,” is all she can manage.
Five minutes later, we’re at the front desk with Max being fawned over. He’s given not one, but one of each kind of sticker scattered at the bottom of the ‘sorry we had to stick you‘ box.
“Did it hurt,” I asked as I lifted him into his car seat.
“No,” he shook his head. ”But it took a long long time.”
Writer Dad
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Heh. You called me “Max.” :) And a good point was brought up in a previous comment: kudos to you for standing up for your kid and not just bending over and taking it (“it” being the new nurse after the long wait…so many parents are intimidated by doctors and don’t speak up even when they are longing to. It’s a WONDERFUL message to give your kids about self-respect and respect for them.)
Heh. You called me “Max.” :) And a good point was brought up in a previous comment: kudos to you for standing up for your kid and not just bending over and taking it (“it” being the new nurse after the long wait…so many parents are intimidated by doctors and don’t speak up even when they are longing to. It’s a WONDERFUL message to give your kids about self-respect and respect for them.)
Writer Dad,
What a day that must have been!
I see Max is a little trooper!
And, you did do the right thing by asking for someone else to give Max a shot. In certain cases, it’s not good to be anyone’s first.
I remember 2 years back I went to get a shot, and they gave me the rookie!
They didn’t say that, but I could tell she was rookie — everything about about her said rookie; the way held the needle and strapped the rubber-band around my arm — even the way she rubbed the alcohol where the needle would go was rookie-like.
And what did I do? Like a fool I stayed shut. To make the story short, she injects the needle; it’s there for 2-3 seemingly never-ending minutes; no blood comes out; she gets panicky, then yells for help.
Someone else had to come and do it all over.
That sucked.
Luis Grosss last blog post..When Family and Friends Show Skepticism Instead of Support
Writer Dad,
What a day that must have been!
I see Max is a little trooper!
And, you did do the right thing by asking for someone else to give Max a shot. In certain cases, it’s not good to be anyone’s first.
I remember 2 years back I went to get a shot, and they gave me the rookie!
They didn’t say that, but I could tell she was rookie — everything about about her said rookie; the way held the needle and strapped the rubber-band around my arm — even the way she rubbed the alcohol where the needle would go was rookie-like.
And what did I do? Like a fool I stayed shut. To make the story short, she injects the needle; it’s there for 2-3 seemingly never-ending minutes; no blood comes out; she gets panicky, then yells for help.
Someone else had to come and do it all over.
That sucked.
Luis Grosss last blog post..When Family and Friends Show Skepticism Instead of Support
Hi Writer Dad,
Congrats on being the NBOTW – you’ve won a new subscriber for sure. Max sounds like a trooper; wish my experiences with my little boy, shots and the doctor went so well. Similar situations with long waits and inexperienced nurses are beyond difficult especially with a swirmy toddler/kid. Great use of details – “wrinkles to the ceiling” and “a woman walks in who looks like she was giving shots back when they were wiping out polio”.
I’ll be back …
Theresa Zagnolis last blog post..The Great Divide?
Hi Writer Dad,
Congrats on being the NBOTW – you’ve won a new subscriber for sure. Max sounds like a trooper; wish my experiences with my little boy, shots and the doctor went so well. Similar situations with long waits and inexperienced nurses are beyond difficult especially with a swirmy toddler/kid. Great use of details – “wrinkles to the ceiling” and “a woman walks in who looks like she was giving shots back when they were wiping out polio”.
I’ll be back …
Theresa Zagnolis last blog post..The Great Divide?
Loved this. I think accurately quoting kids up to about age 6 is always charming. After that, it can be but isn’t guaranteed. Like the other commenters, I’m glad you prevented the rookie from experimenting on Max, especially after he’d already made a mess of your appointment. For my own body, I give rookies two tries, then ask for someone else.
I like it that Max understood why he was getting the injection and chose to thank the nurse for that (at least, that was my take on it, rather than good manners). I always thank the doctors and technicians who take care of me (there are many) when they’re about to leave the room, but if they’ve annoyed me, I try to bring it up at the beginning so I can still thank them at the end. Doctors who consistently don’t respect my time get ditched, but I realize that is not always possible in smaller communities.
I’m not so sure that crying or not crying should be a big deal for the kids. Sometimes I cry at the doctor’s, too, especially if it’s a really bad day or really bad news.
Loved this. I think accurately quoting kids up to about age 6 is always charming. After that, it can be but isn’t guaranteed. Like the other commenters, I’m glad you prevented the rookie from experimenting on Max, especially after he’d already made a mess of your appointment. For my own body, I give rookies two tries, then ask for someone else.
I like it that Max understood why he was getting the injection and chose to thank the nurse for that (at least, that was my take on it, rather than good manners). I always thank the doctors and technicians who take care of me (there are many) when they’re about to leave the room, but if they’ve annoyed me, I try to bring it up at the beginning so I can still thank them at the end. Doctors who consistently don’t respect my time get ditched, but I realize that is not always possible in smaller communities.
I’m not so sure that crying or not crying should be a big deal for the kids. Sometimes I cry at the doctor’s, too, especially if it’s a really bad day or really bad news.
You know, after thinking about this post all day, there is one big detail that jumped out at me. Not to discredit Max in all of glory and teasing Mia, and not even for him to stay dry cheekes, or the polite “thank you for giving me the shot” but the fact that you were able to be there with him that day. I know it kills me when my wife has to take the little ones in for their check-ups and shots, that I can’t be there.
Writer Dad, you are very lucky that you get these opportunities, and Max is very lucky to have a dad like you. Thank you for sharing this with me, when I am stuck at work and can’t make these milestones in my own children’s life. This is the very reason why I would like to be able to freelance for a living.
Sals last blog post..How Do You Deal With Challenges?
You know, after thinking about this post all day, there is one big detail that jumped out at me. Not to discredit Max in all of glory and teasing Mia, and not even for him to stay dry cheekes, or the polite “thank you for giving me the shot” but the fact that you were able to be there with him that day. I know it kills me when my wife has to take the little ones in for their check-ups and shots, that I can’t be there.
Writer Dad, you are very lucky that you get these opportunities, and Max is very lucky to have a dad like you. Thank you for sharing this with me, when I am stuck at work and can’t make these milestones in my own children’s life. This is the very reason why I would like to be able to freelance for a living.
Sals last blog post..How Do You Deal With Challenges?
Kip: Smiles are so awesome, even the moon makes them.
Shamelessly Sassy: It’s not biased, it’s observant.
Steph: Thank you for your compliments. Those sentences are the most fun part of writing. All I knew was that I was going to tell the story of Max saying, “Thank you for my shot.” That’s it. All the other words are like magic appearing from nowhere. It’s why we scribe, right?
NAB: I admit to being intimidated by doctors, but I’m not going to let a newbie nick my boy.
Luis: Everyone’s gotta have a first. If it was me, I wouldn’t have objected; I just wasn’t going to let them do it to Max.
Theresa: I’m glad to have you, and I’ll see you tomorrow.
Dot H: I think it was an even measure of manners and gratitude. I would not have been sad with Max, in the least, had he not cried. Though I was proud of him that he didn’t.
Sal: I am lucky, and I’ll be sad next year when they’re both in school. I’m with you. I have to make freelancing work so that I can live my best life.
Kip: Smiles are so awesome, even the moon makes them.
Shamelessly Sassy: It’s not biased, it’s observant.
Steph: Thank you for your compliments. Those sentences are the most fun part of writing. All I knew was that I was going to tell the story of Max saying, “Thank you for my shot.” That’s it. All the other words are like magic appearing from nowhere. It’s why we scribe, right?
NAB: I admit to being intimidated by doctors, but I’m not going to let a newbie nick my boy.
Luis: Everyone’s gotta have a first. If it was me, I wouldn’t have objected; I just wasn’t going to let them do it to Max.
Theresa: I’m glad to have you, and I’ll see you tomorrow.
Dot H: I think it was an even measure of manners and gratitude. I would not have been sad with Max, in the least, had he not cried. Though I was proud of him that he didn’t.
Sal: I am lucky, and I’ll be sad next year when they’re both in school. I’m with you. I have to make freelancing work so that I can live my best life.
You made the right decision, I let a med. student give The Boy one of his shots. (He was getting two that day.) The Boy was fine — wimpered a bit, it took a bit longer. But I thought for sure the Med. Student was going to stroke out from the stress. The Doc. had to gave him his second shot.
Kids are way tougher than we think.
Nats last blog post..Coffee
You made the right decision, I let a med. student give The Boy one of his shots. (He was getting two that day.) The Boy was fine — wimpered a bit, it took a bit longer. But I thought for sure the Med. Student was going to stroke out from the stress. The Doc. had to gave him his second shot.
Kids are way tougher than we think.
Nats last blog post..Coffee
You did the right thing. Some dads would have just said “suck it up”. Thanks for remembering what it’s like to be a kid.
apathy lounges last blog post..WARNING! The following editorial reflects the opinions of the (PMS-afflicted) writer. Apathy Lounge is not responsible for its content and regrets any unnecessary emotional overkill that might be sustained from reading the following. Save yourselves now!
You did the right thing. Some dads would have just said “suck it up”. Thanks for remembering what it’s like to be a kid.
apathy lounges last blog post..WARNING! The following editorial reflects the opinions of the (PMS-afflicted) writer. Apathy Lounge is not responsible for its content and regrets any unnecessary emotional overkill that might be sustained from reading the following. Save yourselves now!
I would like to think I’d be brave and assertive enough to ask for an experienced nurse – you did the right thing there.
When my daughter had to have several shots at once, the nurse confided that SHE cried the first time she had to give a child a shot; I’ve loved her ever since!
I would like to think I’d be brave and assertive enough to ask for an experienced nurse – you did the right thing there.
When my daughter had to have several shots at once, the nurse confided that SHE cried the first time she had to give a child a shot; I’ve loved her ever since!
Nat: Until it’s time to go to bed.
Apathy Lounge: Thanks. Your blog is funny.
Ann: That nurse is totally lovable.
Nat: Until it’s time to go to bed.
Apathy Lounge: Thanks. Your blog is funny.
Ann: That nurse is totally lovable.
I liked your explanation of a shot: they put a few bad guys in you so that a million good guys can yell at them never to come back :-) I see Max is polite even under difficult circumstances.
Marelisas last blog post..Stress Management: 25 Ways to Relieve Stress
I liked your explanation of a shot: they put a few bad guys in you so that a million good guys can yell at them never to come back :-) I see Max is polite even under difficult circumstances.
Marelisas last blog post..Stress Management: 25 Ways to Relieve Stress
That was cool. You write good ;-)
And gotta love that quote at the top. Too true.
Seamus Anthonys last blog post..Social Media Madness!!!
That was cool. You write good ;-)
And gotta love that quote at the top. Too true.
Seamus Anthonys last blog post..Social Media Madness!!!
Hi! Just found you through your comment. You’re in my Reader now!
Phils last blog post..The Candyland Classroom
Hi! Just found you through your comment. You’re in my Reader now!
Phils last blog post..The Candyland Classroom
Ah, the ole spastic nurse scenario, huh? We had the same thing happen to us only it was the anesthesiologist with our 3rd child. After the rookies 4th attempt at inserting the needle I told the Doc; “I know this is a teaching hospital, but if you don’t take over quick you’re going to be down 1 intern.” He looked at me and said; “Seriously?” I said; “She killed the last one, another one won’t matter and a jury would never convict her.” He grabbed the needle and was done in seconds. I heard him tell the intern; “We’ll let you try the next one, OK?”
NukeDads last blog post..My Fellow Americans…
Ah, the ole spastic nurse scenario, huh? We had the same thing happen to us only it was the anesthesiologist with our 3rd child. After the rookies 4th attempt at inserting the needle I told the Doc; “I know this is a teaching hospital, but if you don’t take over quick you’re going to be down 1 intern.” He looked at me and said; “Seriously?” I said; “She killed the last one, another one won’t matter and a jury would never convict her.” He grabbed the needle and was done in seconds. I heard him tell the intern; “We’ll let you try the next one, OK?”
NukeDads last blog post..My Fellow Americans…
I loved that story. Partly because I can relate to the waiting part. Our doc’s minimum wait time seems to be half an hour. Yes, an eternity with an antsy toddler or freaked out pre-schooler waiting for a shot. But I absolutely loved the way you let your son’s quiet bravery shine through in your story. If only my daughter was that brave! Our deal is that we’ll take her to Disneyworld next year if she doesn’t cry at her doc visit next month. I’m not packing our bags anytime soon!
I loved that story. Partly because I can relate to the waiting part. Our doc’s minimum wait time seems to be half an hour. Yes, an eternity with an antsy toddler or freaked out pre-schooler waiting for a shot. But I absolutely loved the way you let your son’s quiet bravery shine through in your story. If only my daughter was that brave! Our deal is that we’ll take her to Disneyworld next year if she doesn’t cry at her doc visit next month. I’m not packing our bags anytime soon!
Marelisa: Max is like a poster for the Adorable Foundation.
Seamus: Thanks, my man.
Phil: Thanks for putting me in there. I hope I don’t crowd the place.
Nuke Dad: I pity whoever the next one was.
Busymama Kellie. That’s a good deal, and more than enough incentive.
Marelisa: Max is like a poster for the Adorable Foundation.
Seamus: Thanks, my man.
Phil: Thanks for putting me in there. I hope I don’t crowd the place.
Nuke Dad: I pity whoever the next one was.
Busymama Kellie. That’s a good deal, and more than enough incentive.
@ Busymama Kellie,
Good luck with your idea – I hope it works. We made the EXACT SAME DEAL with my daughter, who, as I mentioned above, turns 17 TOMORROW. She has YET to see Disneyworld!
Rita
Ritas last blog post..Contest Time: Blogging for Prophet – a Quiz
@ Busymama Kellie,
Good luck with your idea – I hope it works. We made the EXACT SAME DEAL with my daughter, who, as I mentioned above, turns 17 TOMORROW. She has YET to see Disneyworld!
Rita
Ritas last blog post..Contest Time: Blogging for Prophet – a Quiz
Ahhh, you handled that just right and Max was a little star. Miss M (also 3) is due for her pre-school jabs soon. I hope she is treated as kindly by a lady whose “wrinkles reach for the ceiling.” I loved that line. :D
Ahhh, you handled that just right and Max was a little star. Miss M (also 3) is due for her pre-school jabs soon. I hope she is treated as kindly by a lady whose “wrinkles reach for the ceiling.” I loved that line. :D
What an awesome little guy! Nice thinking on the pinch as well as standing your ground on the “new” nurse….
What an awesome little guy! Nice thinking on the pinch as well as standing your ground on the “new” nurse….