Solitude
I admit it, I can be a pretty loud guy. Solitude is thine enemy.
Although one of my favorite quotes has always been Teddy Roosevelt’s, “Speak softly, and carry a big stick,” I’ve often governed myself more along the lines of:
“Yell a lot and make sure there’s a bazooka bulging from your backpack.”
I try, but sometimes I can’t help it; solitude wasn’t the way I was raised. It’s like spending a lifetime trying to drop an accent, only to have it roll carelessly from your tongue as soon as you’re too exhausted to notice.
My mom does not believe in solitude. She comes over for dinner once a week, and as soon as she starts speaking, the sound from her mouth are as though someone has strapped a bullhorn to the end of her chin. Worse than the volume is the mirror I’m looking in.
The apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree.
Daisy’s the opposite. Solitude is her eternal lover. Her dream vacation, as she said just last week, would be a few days on a Tibetan mountain top where no one would shatter her solitude until she granted permission in writing.
As long as I’ve known her, her need for at least a little quiet falls somewhere neatly between food and water.
When we first moved in together, I’d come home from work, barging into perfect solitude, jumping up and down like a puppy dog needing to be pet. She would look up, cross legged on the floor, and whisper, “Don’t you ever need any downtime.”
I’d say, “You are my downtime, Baby!” (Yes, that is an actual quote.)
A decade later, things have definitely changed. Of the countless gifts she’s given me, her absolute love of solitude has to be one of my favorites.
I’ve never loved silence or solitude more.
The problem is, quiet is like anything else. You taste it, you like it. You like it, you want it. You want it, you can’t have it -
YOU GET EDGY.
Last year, when I first started writing, my fingers could keep dancing across the keyboard, solitude or no. Max would be playing with his race cars (alongside the torrent of requisite sound effects), while Mia was engaged in a series of twirls and pirouettes expertly crafted to capture my the attention of dad, all adding to the crashing symphony from itunes still running in another room.
No problem.
Now, when I’m trying to write and there’s a plastic bag outside that’s fallen in step with the breeze, I feel like sticking my head out the window and shaking my fist. Of course, I’m exaggerating.
A little.
But there’s no escaping the fact that I’ve become dependent on having some solitude at some point in my day. I need, and now demand, at least twenty minutes for each one of the Earth’s rotations. That’s fair, and it’s the only thing that helps me go from this:
To this:
Perhaps if I could bump my solitude to a couple hours, I could pop out a novel or two.
Writer Dad
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About Sean Platt
I love how you tell the story in words and pictures. I guess once you’ve tasted silence you can’t go back.
Marelisas last blog post..100 Tips to Simplify Your Life
I love how you tell the story in words and pictures. I guess once you’ve tasted silence you can’t go back.
Marelisas last blog post..100 Tips to Simplify Your Life
Oh, I am so like your wife on this one. I need 20 minutes of noise per day, and the rest lived in silence. It was a total culture shock moving to Quebec. The Quebecois are so exhuberent! (read noisy) The Urbane Lion isn’t personally noisy, but he loves loud music. I keep turning it down when his back is turned. And attend a parent/child event? The parents make the kids look like they’ve taken a vow of silence!
Urban Panthers last blog post..So, you want to online date
Oh, I am so like your wife on this one. I need 20 minutes of noise per day, and the rest lived in silence. It was a total culture shock moving to Quebec. The Quebecois are so exhuberent! (read noisy) The Urbane Lion isn’t personally noisy, but he loves loud music. I keep turning it down when his back is turned. And attend a parent/child event? The parents make the kids look like they’ve taken a vow of silence!
Urban Panthers last blog post..So, you want to online date
Very funny writer dad.
I’m loud, too. But I also need quiet for LONG periods of time. Or else I get real bitchy.
Get up early and write your novel. That’s what I do with mine.
Ellen Wilsons last blog post..Ethics in Photography
Very funny writer dad.
I’m loud, too. But I also need quiet for LONG periods of time. Or else I get real bitchy.
Get up early and write your novel. That’s what I do with mine.
Ellen Wilsons last blog post..Ethics in Photography
Hey I hear ya! Sometimes, just sometimes, there’s nothing like some good ol’ quiet to bring you back and get you goin’…
Hey I hear ya! Sometimes, just sometimes, there’s nothing like some good ol’ quiet to bring you back and get you goin’…
I am a quiet person and I love – NEED quiet too. So I can relate.
Vereds last blog post..So, Another Guest Post
I am a quiet person and I love – NEED quiet too. So I can relate.
Vereds last blog post..So, Another Guest Post
Marelisa@ Thank you. Yes, the taste is like ice cold water.
Urban Panther@ It’s funny, but when it comes to music, I’m actually the one that has to sneak and turn hers down.
Ellen@ Sigh. I already get up at 5:30.
Ribeezie@ Yeah, the quiet’s like topping your tank off.
Vered@ I have a feeling it’s going to be like large print. I’ll need it in larger measure the older I get.
Marelisa@ Thank you. Yes, the taste is like ice cold water.
Urban Panther@ It’s funny, but when it comes to music, I’m actually the one that has to sneak and turn hers down.
Ellen@ Sigh. I already get up at 5:30.
Ribeezie@ Yeah, the quiet’s like topping your tank off.
Vered@ I have a feeling it’s going to be like large print. I’ll need it in larger measure the older I get.
I don’t often feel the need for silence or noise, or anything of that nature. I find I am often left with lots of time to write or sit and relax…but I lack the inspiration to really get anything else out the door.
I have the time, perhaps if I had the right motivation, I would have a couple of books by now.
Matthew Drydens last blog post..Getting Proper Motivation
I don’t often feel the need for silence or noise, or anything of that nature. I find I am often left with lots of time to write or sit and relax…but I lack the inspiration to really get anything else out the door.
I have the time, perhaps if I had the right motivation, I would have a couple of books by now.
Matthew Drydens last blog post..Getting Proper Motivation
That quote from Teddy is a classic, and I think everyone needs a bit of downtime everyday to rest their minds. But quiet is looking like its a really relative thing. From every part of my house I can hear my kids screaming and laughing so I decided to give up the quest for peace and just work on my laptop with them running around me :)
Marc Beharrys last blog post..Stevens, Ted- (R – AK) Senate: Indicted on False Statement Charges
That quote from Teddy is a classic, and I think everyone needs a bit of downtime everyday to rest their minds. But quiet is looking like its a really relative thing. From every part of my house I can hear my kids screaming and laughing so I decided to give up the quest for peace and just work on my laptop with them running around me :)
Marc Beharrys last blog post..Stevens, Ted- (R – AK) Senate: Indicted on False Statement Charges
I love silence, and I’ve actually been percolating an article on it for a week now. Not only have I always loved silence after all the screaming (if not throwing) arguments in my childhood home, but as a person with fibromyalgia, my nerves have been over-sensitized. Some people are so loud that my ear literally hurts (sorry, WriterDad) and for a while I thought I drew them to me, there were so many in my life. I’ve also been known to burn my tongue on coffee that someone else finds is just right in temperature. After riding home on the subway and the bus, with all the cell phones, by the time I get home I’m just dying for a little quiet.
I love silence, and I’ve actually been percolating an article on it for a week now. Not only have I always loved silence after all the screaming (if not throwing) arguments in my childhood home, but as a person with fibromyalgia, my nerves have been over-sensitized. Some people are so loud that my ear literally hurts (sorry, WriterDad) and for a while I thought I drew them to me, there were so many in my life. I’ve also been known to burn my tongue on coffee that someone else finds is just right in temperature. After riding home on the subway and the bus, with all the cell phones, by the time I get home I’m just dying for a little quiet.
Hmm. I’ve been working on my noisy husband for 9 years now and he’s still noisy. :-) I’m the polar opposite, which makes it very difficult for me to write during the day even though I stay at home. I have 3 little kids that are clones of their Dad and they’re all very exuberant and outgoing… all day long.
I wouldn’t change my family’s personalities for anything, I love ‘em all the way they are…but I need absolute quiet to write and I can’t get enough of it!
Sarah @ Going Bananas Blogs last blog post..When Heat Was Not My Friend
Hmm. I’ve been working on my noisy husband for 9 years now and he’s still noisy. :-) I’m the polar opposite, which makes it very difficult for me to write during the day even though I stay at home. I have 3 little kids that are clones of their Dad and they’re all very exuberant and outgoing… all day long.
I wouldn’t change my family’s personalities for anything, I love ‘em all the way they are…but I need absolute quiet to write and I can’t get enough of it!
Sarah @ Going Bananas Blogs last blog post..When Heat Was Not My Friend
I wholeheartedly agree and hear you. I have raised 3 children on my own for 15 years now, and people think empty nest syndrome will hit me hard. Sorry, I don’t think so. Being able to have the freedom of movement and less accountability to the kids is wonderful, and yes….like a drug that I need a fix of. The solitude is breathtaking.
I just had my first round of quiet in oh so long, and MAN was it music to my ears!rnrnHappy New Year. :)