“Finding a good quote about potty training is hard.  I guess no one really wants to talk about it.”

~Writer Dad

Deciding when, and how to take our wee ones from diapers to deliverance is something every parent must face.  

The common timeframe delivered by experts is somewhere between 18 months and 3 years, though I don’t believe that age is as relevant as readiness. 

If our child can tell us about their dirty diaper, they’re probably ready.

If they can articulate their need to be clean, they’re probably ready.

If as an adult, they might remember a time when they strolled the house in diapers, then they’ve been ready for quite a while.

Toilet training might be the first major chasm we cross as parents.  It involves us as much as them, and should be driven by careful thought. Learning to use the restroom isn’t just about losing the diaper, it’s about gaining personal responsibility.  

When we allow our children to stay in diapers when they’re capable of doing otherwise, simply because they don’t want to take their next step or it’s more convenient for us, then we’re allowing them to make the rules, and setting a poor precedent, at a far too early age.  

Worse, we’re teaching them that we’re comfortable with the idea of cleaning up after them, until they decide different.

I know what you’re thinking —  “But my daughter’s only two.” 

That may be true, but she’ll soon be four, then six… then sixteen.  

Right now, she’s learning who she is, and those first years are paramount.

For some children, training is effortless, as easy as slipping vegetables into the mac and cheese.  For others, it’s a trying time when our spawn will heavily assert their will. 

This difficulty shouldn’t detour.  Remember, it’s called potty training.  We may have a little extra laundry, and a load of extra conflict, but the battle is relatively short, and when it’s over, our child is stronger and so are we.

This is all very pragmatic; yet perfectly practical parents seem to lose all perspective when it comes to potty training. 

It’s delicate. 

Either we hedge because of the anticipated difficulty, or we’re afraid of the damage to their psyche if we push too hard or too fast.

As far as cerebral ruin is concerned, I’m not suggesting that anyone wrap their children in chains until they can properly eliminate.  I’m simply saying we should observe our children, for it is us who know them best. 

When we’re confident they understand what’s happening, and what they’re supposed to do, and their bodies are capable of getting the job done, then we have no excuse as parents to stand idle and allow them to make messes for us to clean, with no accountability to themselves.

Potty training doesn’t begin when we finally decide to grit our teeth and buy a couple dozen pair of underwear.  It’s an awareness that we should build into the conversation from the changing table on.

I know the subject’s touchy, and I certainly didn’t raise it to see my subscriber count drop, but Daisy and I have trained ten children in the last three years.  If approached clinically, and in the right window, potty training is a positive and empowering experience.

Today’s wee-book was written from that experience.  Please consider a purchase.  It’s eight wonderful pages and prints beautifully.  You can laminate it and let your little one hold it in their hand.  It’s the first collaborative fruit from the Writer Dad tree; its success is fertilizer for more.  

The awesome picture up top is from Dave at Blogger Dad. He’s melted a multitude of minutes to draw and format this wee-book, without seeing a single penny.  

I hope to correct that this weekend, but either way, I’m glad we could offer potty training help to those who need it.

It’s been a great week.  See you Monday.

Writer Dad

If you liked my words, please subscribe by RSS or email.  I’ll be back again on Monday.

Going to the potty is something we must do.  Mommies do it.  Daddies do it.  Even me and you…

Previous Friday releases:  Mia Maria and Two Times the Kindergarten, Lucas Bright: I Know I’m Special, The Eighth Wonder of the World, and Bye Bye Butterfly.