A friend is one of the nicest things you can have, and one of the best things you can be.
~Douglas Pagels
Bloggers I Heart: Blogger Dad
I love writing for Writer Dad. It’s tremendous fun. Though the whirlpool of words is a ball, the real benefit of the blog is the people who’ve entered my life.
Comments are as constant as coffee; I love them thrice as much. Every so often, a comment leaves the blog’s basement behind, then leaks into an email… then nine… soon a hundred.
I’d like to plant my flag in new tradition. I think we’ll call it, “Bloggers I Heart.”
Bloggers I heart are the bloggers with whom I have a running dialogue. These are the ladies and gentleman who, were I in their city, I couldn’t imagine bread not being broken.
Anyone who has been with us longer than a week will need no introduction, but I’ll send out a sentence anyway. It’s only fitting I start with David Wright; alter ego, Blogger Dad. I stole his name, he stole my theme, and now here we are an armload of weeks later. We’ve collaborated before and will again. I don’t know how many days have passed without at least a single email, but they were few and probably sad.
Without further ado, my friend, Blogger Dad:
My Feet Never Touched the Bahamas, but My Voice Found Paradise.
Are you writing in YOUR voice or are you mimicking someone else’s?
The best way to show you how to find your voice is to tell you how I found mine.
I used to think that writing humor was easy. My influences growing up were 80’s-era Letterman, Eddie Murphy, George Carlin, Saturday Night Live “when it was good” and columnist, Dave Barry. I ate comedy for breakfast, lunch, dinner and midnight snacks (emphasis on the snacks). I knew that someday I would be making people laugh. All I needed was an audience.
I started writing for a local paper three years ago, convinced that I was going to be the Next Dave Barry. Unfortunately, the paper wasn‘t looking for a columnist. They assigned me to the political beat. While there is plenty of unintentional humor to be found in covering local politics, I rarely got a chance to flex my humor muscles in straight news stories.
While I plugged away at my beat, I practiced writing a humor column in hopes my bosses would see how brilliant I am and would give me a shot. Soon, I realized that writing humor is hard. Hell, it’s almost work.
I showed a few samples to my editor and mentor, Jason Whited. He gave some advice, carefully couching criticisms within compliments to protect my fragile writer’s ego. One of the things he said shocked me, though.
“This isn’t your voice,” he said.
“Huh?” I asked, “Of course it is! I wrote it.”
“Yeah, but this isn’t the YOU that I talk to. You haven’t found your voice yet.”
Though not intentional, my first attempts at a column were merely pale imitations of Dave Barry. My writing was like a decent karaoke performance. I sounded enough like the singer I was imitating, and some tone deaf people might even have found it listenable, but there was something lacking.
Jason’s advice was this, “Write from your heart, write often, and you will find your voice.”
Stop trying to be the next (insert writer name here)
In January 2006, I was asked to step up to the plate.
My publisher made a bet with me that I couldn’t lose 100 pounds before the year was up. If I won, he would pay for a trip for me and my wife to the Bahamas. If I lost, well, I’d be publicly embarrassed. But even if I lost, I was still a winner, because I was getting a shot at writing a regular column every other week about my efforts.
This was my chance to prove myself!
Just let go
My first piece had to be a good one. No, make that great! I wrote a few different drafts, starting out with an emphasis on “the funny” and once again aping Dave Barry’s style. On the night prior to my deadline, I was sitting in front of my computer, cycling through different drafts of the column. I was attempting to cobble something together. It wasn’t working. Then a thought occurred to me – let go.
I deleted each of the drafts quickly and decisively, knowing that if I didn’t kill them without hesitation, I would never be able to.
I put on some music, closed my eyes and searched inside. I had to lay it all out on the page. I had to be brutally honest about a subject I’d tried to dance around for most of my life. I needed to expose myself as I’d never done before. I needed to do it with humor and heart. I opened my eyes and then wrote my ass off.
After reading my first column, Jason took me out to lunch and congratulated me.
“This made me weep, man,” he confessed while looking me in the eyes, “You, my friend, have got the gift. You’ve found your voice.”
I sure as hell don’t feel all that gifted, but I believe the second part of his statement.
I wrote a lot that year, even if I didn’t lose a lot of weight. (Six pounds, for the record, so obviously my feet never touched tropical paradise.) I wrote about diets, my relationship with my father, working out and a number of other topics which people still come up to me today and ask me about. Many people told me that my columns made them laugh and cry. It was amazing to make such connections with readers.
I discovered that I wasn’t a straight up humor writer. I would never have discovered my voice if I tried to stay in the mold I had created for myself. I had to break free and be afraid to fail at what I thought I wanted to be. I am a hybrid writer, sometimes funny, but best when I write from the heart.
I know that my journey to great writing is far from over. I’m sure I will struggle for years to be as good as I’d like to be. Fortunately, I’m no longer trying to be someone else.
I’m singing my own songs now.
Blogger Dad
Nine out of ten dentists agree, teeth are ten times whiter with Blogger Dad in their reader. You can subscribe for free, right here. In you’d like to be informed of mealtimes, this is where he tweets.
About Sean Platt
@ Oktober Five – Another LOL
Bamboo Forests last blog post..7 Paths to Excessive Wealth
@ Oktober Five – Another LOL
Bamboo Forests last blog post..7 Paths to Excessive Wealth
Dave: Leaving out the G in “Gangsta” is like leaving the cherry off of a sunday.
BJ: If I couldn’t write honestly, I don’t know that I’d want to bother.
Steph: You know how I feel about the Bloggess. Dooce on the other hand, I’m not so sure. I’ve checked her out a couple of times, but I don’t like that comments are always closed and I haven’t yet connected with the writing. I’ll give her another shot though. You’re right, being yourself will lead to far more rewarding relationships.
Chris: I get the impression you’re rather loved in our corner of the blogosphere.
Oktober Five: That is super funny.
Jamie: Well said. We are an accumulation of every moment we’ve ever had, including those spent reading.
Dave: Leaving out the G in “Gangsta” is like leaving the cherry off of a sunday.
BJ: If I couldn’t write honestly, I don’t know that I’d want to bother.
Steph: You know how I feel about the Bloggess. Dooce on the other hand, I’m not so sure. I’ve checked her out a couple of times, but I don’t like that comments are always closed and I haven’t yet connected with the writing. I’ll give her another shot though. You’re right, being yourself will lead to far more rewarding relationships.
Chris: I get the impression you’re rather loved in our corner of the blogosphere.
Oktober Five: That is super funny.
Jamie: Well said. We are an accumulation of every moment we’ve ever had, including those spent reading.
Good post Blogger Dad. I have been kicking those thoughts around for a while now. Is Malathionman my voice? I often wonder.
malathionmans last blog post..Why I Sometimes Feel Old
Good post Blogger Dad. I have been kicking those thoughts around for a while now. Is Malathionman my voice? I often wonder.
malathionmans last blog post..Why I Sometimes Feel Old
I want to be the next Blogger Dad. Or Writer Dad.
Oh, wait…oops…I don’t have the dangly bits. Dang. Story of my life.
Oh, well…guess I’ll just keep on bein’ me and hope for the best. I heart y’alls blogs (“y’all’s” is TOO a word!!), so you are doing something right…or wrong…probably because you aren’t pretentious.
To quote Sting…”Be yourself, no matter what they say…” (Englishman in New York, The Dream of the Blue Turtles, please tell me someone remembers that album besides me, or I may cry!)
Shade and Sweetwater,
K
Kyddryns last blog post..Punk(in)ed
I want to be the next Blogger Dad. Or Writer Dad.
Oh, wait…oops…I don’t have the dangly bits. Dang. Story of my life.
Oh, well…guess I’ll just keep on bein’ me and hope for the best. I heart y’alls blogs (“y’all’s” is TOO a word!!), so you are doing something right…or wrong…probably because you aren’t pretentious.
To quote Sting…”Be yourself, no matter what they say…” (Englishman in New York, The Dream of the Blue Turtles, please tell me someone remembers that album besides me, or I may cry!)
Shade and Sweetwater,
K
Kyddryns last blog post..Punk(in)ed
@WD – I think there should be a new angsta movement – an emo derivative.
@Kyddryn – which is the coolest name – did you know that song has it’s own wikipedia entry? Apparently it’s about Quentin Crisp. I am a Sting freak.
Betsy Wuebkers last blog post..ENERGY
@WD – I think there should be a new angsta movement – an emo derivative.
@Kyddryn – which is the coolest name – did you know that song has it’s own wikipedia entry? Apparently it’s about Quentin Crisp. I am a Sting freak.
Betsy Wuebkers last blog post..ENERGY
Sometimes I wonder if I should write about something to drive traffic…but whether or not it does, so long as someone says, “Me, too,” it’s a good day :-). I agree, letting our voice sing out is the surefire way of standing out in the blogging world.
Good for you on finding your voice!
Pink Inks last blog post..Day In the Sun
Sometimes I wonder if I should write about something to drive traffic…but whether or not it does, so long as someone says, “Me, too,” it’s a good day :-). I agree, letting our voice sing out is the surefire way of standing out in the blogging world.
Good for you on finding your voice!
Pink Inks last blog post..Day In the Sun
Hi Blogger Dad! What an awesome story. I feel like every day is another step toward finding my writer’s voice. In fact, it’s one of the greatest challenges for many writers and takes a lot of practice and definitely requires the art of letting go. Personal stories like yours will help young and new writers find their voices. Nice work.
Melissa Donovans last blog post..Writing for Animals
Hi Blogger Dad! What an awesome story. I feel like every day is another step toward finding my writer’s voice. In fact, it’s one of the greatest challenges for many writers and takes a lot of practice and definitely requires the art of letting go. Personal stories like yours will help young and new writers find their voices. Nice work.
Melissa Donovans last blog post..Writing for Animals
Blogger dad, we seem to be tweeters of a similar kind. Nicely written. I especially resonate with the last line.
Kip de Molls last blog post..Time To Tell
Blogger dad, we seem to be tweeters of a similar kind. Nicely written. I especially resonate with the last line.
Kip de Molls last blog post..Time To Tell
Hello! I have been blogging for a number of years now. In blogging, I learned to know myself more, but as I roam around other blogger’s sites — i felt intimidated by the number of audience they are getting. I was blinded, and I guess I wanted to make a “name” back then… but as you said “writing humor is hard”. I pushed myself — but I could make things better, if I didn’t think of MORE hits or comments (hhaah). Expressing what comes first in one’s mind, may be the best after all.
Thanks for sharing! HAHA. Keep it up.
Hello! I have been blogging for a number of years now. In blogging, I learned to know myself more, but as I roam around other blogger’s sites — i felt intimidated by the number of audience they are getting. I was blinded, and I guess I wanted to make a “name” back then… but as you said “writing humor is hard”. I pushed myself — but I could make things better, if I didn’t think of MORE hits or comments (hhaah). Expressing what comes first in one’s mind, may be the best after all.
Thanks for sharing! HAHA. Keep it up.
Betsy: That’s super funny. I had to read it twice, but the second time I guffawed.
Reissa: It’s definitely more about the words than the hits, but sometimes it is difficult to feel that with certainty.
Betsy: That’s super funny. I had to read it twice, but the second time I guffawed.
Reissa: It’s definitely more about the words than the hits, but sometimes it is difficult to feel that with certainty.
Malathionman – Thank you. And only you can answer your question.
Kyddryn – Thank you. As for the dangly bits, there ARE operations one can have if one truly desires to have them. Just ask Dave Fowler!
Pink Ink – Thank you. As for writing traffic driving things, I guess it all depends on your blogging goals. If you want to rake in cash, then I’m sure there are topics which lend to that. The only question is, is that what you want to write? As for me, I’m not counting on making money from this blog. I hope it will help me in other areas, though.
Melissa – Thank you, I appreciate the nice words.
Kip de Moll – tweet, tweet. Thank you, I appreciate the nice words. I have you on my blogs to visit this week list (along with other commenters here).
Reissa – Well, writing humor is hard for me. I’m sure to some people it might come easily. If not, you just have to work at it, or like me, find what works for you.
Blogger Dads last blog post..It’s The Schwartzman Quartet!
Malathionman – Thank you. And only you can answer your question.
Kyddryn – Thank you. As for the dangly bits, there ARE operations one can have if one truly desires to have them. Just ask Dave Fowler!
Pink Ink – Thank you. As for writing traffic driving things, I guess it all depends on your blogging goals. If you want to rake in cash, then I’m sure there are topics which lend to that. The only question is, is that what you want to write? As for me, I’m not counting on making money from this blog. I hope it will help me in other areas, though.
Melissa – Thank you, I appreciate the nice words.
Kip de Moll – tweet, tweet. Thank you, I appreciate the nice words. I have you on my blogs to visit this week list (along with other commenters here).
Reissa – Well, writing humor is hard for me. I’m sure to some people it might come easily. If not, you just have to work at it, or like me, find what works for you.
Blogger Dads last blog post..It’s The Schwartzman Quartet!